[C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ●

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[C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ● 

Message par GuardianDreamer » Lun Mai 01, 2017 11:49 pm

Here's the link thing.

Made for the No Pressure competition, this comedy case is in the 1200-1300 frame range, though it'll probably feel shorter since a good amount of that is optional. Defend Him, Not Me! is basically me deciding to do whatever is most fun and being absolutely ridiculous. It's ultimately a comedy about a very silly accusation, a defendant's attempts to point out how quick it'd be to dismiss in court, but everyone taking much longer than they should on the "crime". With a fourth-wall breaking protagonist, a judge who goes with the flow way too much, and an incompetent prosecutor, what could possibly go wrong? The main focus is on banter and providing the player with a charming and fun experience. This case encourages you to goof off and present the badge for bonus conversations at every testimony.

As a note: It's impossible to fail this case. There's absolutely no way to be penalized. So don't worry about presenting the wrong evidence if you want to goof off. Also, this may or may not turn into a series one day depending on how I feel when I'm done with some other writing projects (most notably a certain serious trial I've left unfinished for way too long). Each case is planned to feel fairly independent of one another though, so this case should feel like a complete experience by itself. So... Enjoy? (I'm too lazy to make a nice-looking thread. If this becomes a series one day, I might bug someone for thread design help.)

Praise for DHNM:
NihilisticNinja a écrit :it should stop

Tiagofvarela a écrit :The English feels natural, despite most of what is said being complete rubbish

GuardianDreamer a écrit :*Jumps into the nearest dumpster and rolls around in the trash*

Spoiler : Credits :
Junko for making Kiss Him, Not Me! which inspired the game's title.
Tiagofvarela for hosting the competition this was made for.
My fellow competitors in said competition and everyone involved in making their games.
NihilisticNinja for beta-testing this.
Enthalpy for using programming magic to fix the text speed when I didn't realize that using the V5 editor and then upgrading to the V6 one meant that the frames I had written in V5 were a lot slower.
DragonTrainer for making Allie and Deneb's sprites.
Tear for making Crow's sprites.
Tear and Silver Glas for making Mildred's sprites.
gotMLK7 for making Crow's sprites.
Singidava for making Duran's sprites. Here's her art thread.
Anyone who supported me along the way, even if it was just through having a short conversation with me on AAOC that made me happy.

Spoiler : Walkthrough :
Crow's testimony: Present the Flower Vase on the third statement.

Deneb's first testimony: Present the Money on either the second or third statement.

Deneb's second testimony: Present the Flower Vase on the last statement.
My Twitter is here
My Trials: Zodow Zark: Amateur Ace Attorney, Undying Dream (Undergoing major revisions/fixes, part 3 soon)
My Comedies: There Are No Turnabouts, Defend Him, Not Me! (Potentially becoming a series soon!)
Other stories: The Guardian and the Dreamer
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Re: [C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ● 

Message par DWaM » Mar Mai 02, 2017 2:42 am

Listen to me, there's no time to explain.

DWaM doesn't exist. At least not entirely. I'm actually you. Yes, you, the person reading this. You know who you are. I've traveled back from this date to the past seven years to warn you of this day. Because I had to. Because it was super-important that you be informed. True, I mean, you would've probably found out either way. I mean, I know I did. I mean, it's like when someone tells you a spoiler and you're like "nooooo the movie's ruined" but then a few months later you go and watch the movie and the entire time the words of that sniggling bastard rings in your head, since you can FEEL that the movie is heading in the direction told you it was. Yeah. Yeah, it's kinda like that. Only I wasn't spoiled per-se. I just kinda... happened to be here when it all went down. And, I mean, look, I'm not a dick. I'm not gonna, like, show up and be like "listen on may so and so this will go down", like... spoilers?? You also, I guess, have to take into account the fact that'd probably cause a time paradox. Like, you know, how you go back in time and kill your granddad before he had your father, which in turn means your dad was never born, which means you were never born, which means you couldn't have been born to kill your grandfather which causes AWESOME? Yeah, kinda like that, except without the murder. And the AWESOME, knowing me. Or, well, you. Oh, and without the horrifying existential dread that the paradox probably was born about. I mean, killing your grand dad is pretty hardcore. I'm sure someone like Sartre wrote about it at some point. I mean for crying out loud, the dude once wrote a scene where another dude (the dude in the story that he wrote, and in which that scene in situated) touched a bus seat and was like "whooooooooooaaaaaaa reality tho???" or something like that. It wasn't in my high school curriculum. I mean, it was, but it was like - you didn't HAVE to read it? As in, it wasn't mandatory? Kinda weird that the way it basically works is they teach you "hey this guy was great, his works were super interesting, but aside from this one excerpt from this novel of which we only give you a small context for, you don't have to read it". Which is fair enough, I mean, most high school kids don't wanna be bothered with that shit, they wanna go about their daily lives jumping through flowers, in a spectacular cartoon parody (directed by the Family Guy animation staff, because the money's tight yo; then again, what if they're paid a bunch and they've realized nobody cares about the animation quality, so they're pretty much just scamming Seth McFarlane? Oh hell, who am I kidding, ol Seth boy is probably the goddamn ringleader.) Anyway, the thing you gotta realize with teenagers is that there's two kinds of em. Both of them are terrible, which is why I probably won't ever have kids. I mean, imagine being me -- which is you, by the way, you really should be taking notes -- and having a kid. Crazy, right?? And I don't mean that 'right' as in, the political right. I'm not here to ruffle any feathers my dude, I (again, that's you we're talking about) can just go to twitter and look at NN's feed for any live politics updates (I -- again, we -- that is, you -- realized that that sentence makes no sense if I am NN, so NN, I'm sorry, but you can't be me. I can still maybe be you, I guess, though. I wonder, though, if that would trigger an existential crisis all on its own. By the by, how're you dealing with that whole 'you're me' thing, anyway? Not you, NN, I was talking to the person that's actually me from the future. I mean the past, shit. Yeah, how's that working out for you? How does it feel knowing you're bound to become me? Hm? Oh, right, the thing I wanted to tell you. Well, see, on this date, I played through GD's comp entry, and I enjoyed it quite a lot. It was weird to watch the defendant's sprite floating. I would say his name, but I'm afraid it's about 2:30 AM and my thoughts are what they are, my dude. But anyway, forget the sprite thing, it's just a minor complaint and could just be that I hadn't upgraded Firefox. What's the meat and butter is right here -- my dude. Dude. My dude. Allie is GD. This isn't even a conspiracy theory. If it was, I would be the one writing it, but I'm not, GD wrote this, it says so in the trial player. Every conversation I've had with this man is this trial personified. Or trialified. [Trialfied?] It's not even Allie, it's pretty much the entirety of the case. And hell, that's not a bad thing. Despite the fact that virtually nothing makes sense -- or, hm, that's not actually fair -- things do make sense. A bit too much sometimes. Characters' line of thoughts track from one conversation topic to another quite seamlessly. Guess that's why GD got the butter during the ceremony, I suppose. It's as if you're watching a stream of consciousness unfold, with that one sane rational part of the human spirit trying to get you back into reality and failing miserably. And that's not a bad thing. I enjoyed that, but mainly because I enjoy these sorts of conversations when they happen in real life. Is this for everyone? Prooobably not, especially since a lot of comedy in general is pretty damn subjective to begin with. But for what it was, I -- remember, that's you -- enjoyed it. [Upon further examination, I've come to realize that the previous paragraph also doesn't make sense if I'm GD, so sorry GD, but you can't be me. And given that me giving praise to you would be weird if I was you, then I can't be you either. Remember, NN, that doesn't apply to you, no need to panic, you can still be me. <EDIT: Upon further examination of the previous line, I have to come to realize that I could, in fact, still be NN. {But wait, if I -- remember, again, really important, that's you -- then you are also NN. But if NN is you, and you are me, then I can not exist! Or wait, no, I can. I do. It's just that NN doesn't exist. Phew. Sorry NN, dude, tough break there.} Anyway, even if I could be NN, I'm not NN, given the fact that I clearly stated otherwise in a previous paragraph. By which I mean, this one. {Note: something current, as it turns out, cannot be previous.}> In any case, it's a shame I couldn't be GD, though. There is a distinct sense of joy and care put into these works of his, even though they might not be obvious to the people who don't know him. I enjoy them a lot personally for what they are and I think it's something one doesn't see a lot of these days. If I could give it an adjective, I guess I'd call this writing 'gentle'? If that makes sense? Well, it probably will to someone. Not to me -- remember, that's you -- so it'll probably mean something to GD. Who knows. Except I weirdly think that I might've said this before. Oh, well, who knows.] Overall, I'd say I enjoyed the trial quite a bit. Whether I recommend it or not, I wouldn't know. As I've said, it's entirely subjective to being with. It's not too long, so one can of course give it a shot. If it doesn't work for ya -- well, that sucks, but it is what it is, as I've said. All I know is that I -- remember, again, can't stress this enough -- that's you, personally enjoyed it.) Anyway, what I'm trying to say is -- I'm PewDiePie, like comment and subscribe, peace out bros. Wait, no does he say that. Screw it, I'm just gonna punch you in the face and run off. If the cops ask, it was supposed to be a brofist. With your nose. And given that I'm you, I'll probably need some plastic surgery after punching you. Which is why I probably shouldn't punch you. Except wait, you're not LITERALLY me, you're just me from the past, right? Oh, crap, but wait, if I punch you in the past and mess up your nose, then I'll end up with a messed up nose. I mean, not necessarily, but it's still a risk I can't take, given that I -- remember, that's you -- have no money. So there's only one solution.

You gotta punch me in the face.
Credits to Hersh for the avy! | My Twitter -- I'm mostly here these days
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Re: [C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ● 

Message par kwando1313 » Mar Mai 02, 2017 3:02 am

dwam are you okay

Heshy made this sig/Opannah art~ <3 <3 Avatar made by the wonderful StaticMegaByte~


Natsuki best senpai







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Re: [C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ● 

Message par NihilismFormula » Mar Mai 02, 2017 3:21 am

DWaM I will give you a hug if you need one.

But yeah this is a really fun case you should play it. The comedy might not be your thing- comedy is inherently subjective after all- but I'd at least give it a try personally.
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Re: [C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ● 

Message par cesar26100 » Dim Mai 07, 2017 2:04 am

I just finished this case. I have no idea where one even starts reviewing something like this, so I will just say that I enjoyed it. Would definitely play a series of this, assuming I would be able to stand all the weirdness for a longer period of time.
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Re: [C][CE] Defend Him, Not Me! ● 

Message par Enthalpy » Dim Jan 20, 2019 4:35 pm

I'm not sure what this was, but it was funny. I like it.

Inspired (if highly obscure) choice of Mildred's theme, but was the source for "078-Funny-People"?
[D]isordered speech is not so much injury to the lips that give it forth, as to the disproportion and incoherence of things in themselves, so negligently expressed. ~ Ben Jonson

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