The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

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The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Broocevelt »

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Whew... Finally, I thought this day would never come!
After the long wait, it is time to show the presents for the Invisible Friend Dan is busy and late 2013 Edition

I usually give a little introductive message with each present, but this year since i'm lazy- there are presents whose origins I don't know, I'll just give them like that. Yeah... go me on that! We all love Dan, of course he knows what he's doing! (Not really. Well now I'm literally just writing the first things which come to mind. So yeah, you can stop paying attention now.)

Anyway, without further ado, here are the presents! The order corresponds to the sign-up order. Enjoy!
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Spoiler : Koda :
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Spoiler : SwagmaWampyr :
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Spoiler : Mono the Meerp :
Your IF wrote:Hey Mono. When you see what my gift is you'll pretty much know who this is. I had to actually draw and my drawing is awful but you said that I should do this months ago so remember that. ;_; Also my printer scanner wouldn't work so I had to lazily take a picture of my picture with my Android. Huzzah.

Anyway, without further ado, here is Underwear Model Gregor. Or should I say Buzz Lightyear!Gregor:

Gregor picture
Doodle in the corner (Gerome)

Anyway, I wanted to get you a sig alongside this but I ran out of time. I promise I'll still make you one, though.
Spoiler : Wackyman :
Since the identity of the Invisible Friend is probably determined by the presents and it would take too long for me to reupload them, I will give you the link to the presents directly :P

http://www.mediafire.com/watch/zfwddwkz ... 52_696.mp4
http://www.mediafire.com/watch/9fx1mzl8 ... 37_696.mp4
http://www.mediafire.com/watch/1z3z94k6 ... 43_696.mp4

There's something for you on Steam as well xP
Spoiler : enigma :
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A (Completely Out-of-Character) Puzzles Enigma Story
You think I'm joking?
I'm not.
Nobody OOC's dis like I do.
Chapter Un


We all make mistakes, okay?

Yeah, yeah, I know how it sounds to start a conversation like that - the kind of crap some degenerate lowlife would say when faced with the grand s///storm he caused and without a proper excuse other than he's an idiot, but...
Actually, there is no but. I'm just an idiot. I have no justified explanation for the things I've done nor do I have a way of getting out of their consequences. I'm stuck. Trapped between two walls slowly closing in on me. You know, kind of like that movie - Saw. I forget which sequel (they had like ten, and I'm in no mood to figure out which one I'm trying to reference here). Granted, Saw isn't the first movie or even... THING to have human pancake makers, but I thought that a connection to a horror movie would be appropriate for my situation.

Oh, right. I forgot something. Sorry. Kind of in a hurry. Well, not really. Kind of. I already said "kind of", but I'm "kind of" kind of in a hurry, I guess. ...Sort of.

Ugh. Look - here's what you need to know. My name is Puzzles. Puzzles Enigma. Don't comment on the name (I know you can't, don't worry) - my mother gave it to me and I was frankly too lazy to change it back (except that one time where I thought of doing it, but then she died, her death was super-suspicious and I really couldn't risk looking like a hating son by throwing away the name she gave me - but I digress). But "Enigma" isn't a real last name. Come on. Can't make things too easy, now can I? Anyway, I'm a defense attorney by profession. I suppose you could call me a "rookie", but then again, you could also call me a dick and have the same result - stating the obvious. I've had cases, mind you, succcessful ones, but considering that it's barely been a year since I've had this badge on my collar, I'd rather not act like a show-off.

Now, I could go on and ramble on for a few hours on the psychological reasons why people consider me less-than-desireable company, maybe give you insight into my past, tell you that I once shot a guy that tried to mug me and buried his body in the middle of nowhere (to all police officials possibly reading this - that's mainly an exaggeration on my part - there is NO body buried on the side of the A6 highway), but I feel like we'd be wasting time.

So instead, we might as well have ourselves a good ol' fashioned retrospective. Get you up to speed. Not like I have anything better to do.

...*Sigh*

Look, I'm sorry. I know that talking to you (or is it... writing to you...?) like this doesn't qualify me as.... a likeable narrator, per-se. Maybe it's just the stress (though, I doubt it). Maybe it's the fact that I suffer from mild split-personality disorder (though, again - I doubt it). Maybe it's the fact that... I'm just like this and nothing can change it. Maybe it's the fact that it's this kind of thinking and attitude that got me in this mess.
Well - in that case, I suppose I have nobody to blame but myself, then. For being what I essentially always was.

... I tried to change. I really did. But--
No. Nonononononono. Nope. We're not doing this. No backstory. You think you can trick me into developing, learning something, but no - we're not doing this here, okay? Maybe when I screw up again, but today isn't exactly my day.
Let's just... Let's just get this over with. If possible.

So...
My story begins shortly after fighting off the giants disguised as windmills on a far, open field, with the help of my trusty steed Rocinante while on our quest to serve and protect, bring justice to the innocent and redemption to the wicked. Wizard thought they could trick my eyes, but the truth is as clear to me as is the Knight's Code of Honor!

...But then Sancho left (found out his real name was Sanchez, go figure) and didn't speak English, my trusty steed turned out to be skinny as all hell and died when I slammed him into the windmills and I realized that this is all a reference to Don Quixote, of all things.

No - my story actually begins with me laying on the couch, watching the 6th season of Pokemon and wondering to myself how is it that I haven't gotten a case in two months. Naturally, I didn't have to wonder long - some blue-suited, spiky-haired... guy (who I'm going to call "Kim", since I can't remember his name for the life of me) brought the end to "The Dark Age of Law" or something and became the hottest thing since sliced bread. Which meant all the clients when to him. Which means that I was left with loose change (literally, my wallet was wet from crying. ...And from me accidentally dropping it in the dishwasher, but that's a story for another time). So, you can imagine that in that despair and boredom, the only sensible thing for a lonely, practically out of a job (wink, wink, economy), and incredibly handsome 20-something year old is to be on his couch watching Pokemon.

...Man, Pikachu is awesome.

Anyway - as I was there, as I previously might've mentioned, on my couch watching season 6, I happened to get a phone call. "A client!", I thought as I didn't recognize the caller ID.
...Unfortunately for me, it turned out to be the rather loud and fat - I'm sorry, let me be politcally correct here - REALLY fat landlady (who the other tenants called "Rodrigo" for some reason) reminding me to get off my ass, find a job, get money and pay the rent. How nice of her. I'm surprised I still haven't added her to my contact list.

But, she did have a point. I was barely making end's meet and laying around wasn't going to get me anywhere. I was going to have to do something. The question was - what, though? Getting a case wasn't as simple as... walking to the detention center and asking for a client!

...

So then I went to the detention center and asked for a client. Of course, you can imagine the look on the shocked guard's face at the entrance.
...You can then also imagine the look on mine when he lead me to a visitor's room, told me to take a seat and that he'll "bring him in" shortly. It was madness! But hey, I wasn't going to complain.
They ended up bringing some guy into the room, skinny, black hair, black clothes, white goatee, eyepatch. The kind of guy that screamed "innocent", you know? The swastika tattoo on his forehead was an especially nice touch.
"Oh, hell no", I said as I jumped out of my chair and headed for the exit. Could've sworn I heard the guards laughing as was taking to my heels, but I suppose that a stupid idea like this one deserved to be made fun of.

So, my next course of action was to scam arguably the most fair and generous resident of our fine state of Japanifornia. ...The state itself. After all, if I got state-appointed, then nobody would be able to deny my a paycheck.

So, I called my friend Shirley that worked in the courthouse and kindly asked her to appoint me to a case as a defense attorney. Now, at the time, I had forgotten that earlier that year I'd gotten somewhat drunk, dialed her number and said some... less that appreciative things on her looks and - well, you can imagine how the talk with Shirley went:

Puzzles: So... If it's not too much trouble, would it be possible if you appointed me to a case?
Shirley: Burn in hell.

Yeah, pretty well.

So, now I was stuck. Kind of literally since I ended up accidentally locking myself out of my bathroom later that day, forgetting where I put the key... but I suppose that's a bit irrelevant to my situation at the time. (Not that the bathroom thing wasn't a "situation"...)
So, after hours of despairing, I eventually decided to take a walk. This wasn't the kind of neighbourhood to strip you of everything you had (not that I had much at the time, to be fair... aside from the cool beige vest), so I felt safe enough to do it at, say, 2 AM.

And it was during that walk that something strange happened.

Chapter Deux


So, I was walking down Summers Avenue when a well-dressed man wearing a... a mask approched me. He walked right in front of me and just... stopped.

Puzzles: Is there... Something wrong?

I asked, not really sure if I was about to be taken to a back alley and assulted or straight-up murdered. Or hey, maybe he was like that one racist guy in Grand Theft Auto IV that would give me a 100$ for no reason.

???: ...Mr. Puzzles Enigma.

Again, he didn't actually say "Enigma" - totally not my real last name.
...Oh, right. I also freaked out for a second that he knew my name.

Puzzles: Do we... know each other?
???: ...In a sense.
Puzzles: I... don't think there's going three ways about it. We either do or don't.
???: I know you. But you don't know me.
Puzzles: How... nice... ... So... Who might you be?
???: I am a messenger.
Puzzles: Facebook or...?
???: Funny.
Puzzles: Not really.
???: I come with an invitation...

He said that, sliding his right hand into his left breast pocket. I figured it was around that time that I should've ran, but I'm guessing it was one of those situations where my legs just gave out.
I suddenly couldn't feel hate in all those horror movies where the characters' stupid decisions lead them to their deaths. In the heat of the moment, just not pissing yourself is worth kudos. ...But to my surprise, he actually pulled out an envelope. not sure why that surprised me, considering he said a second before that he's bringing an invitation, but whatever.

Puzzles: ...Oh.
???: ...Oh?
Puzzles: Yeah, "Oh". Just kinda... Excepted you to, uh...
???: Shoot you?
Puzzles: Yeah, kinda.
???: Oh, Mr. Enigma. How... delightfully ignorant. The last thing we'd want is to kill you.
Puzzles: ...We?

The well-dressed man simply smiled at stretched the envelope out to me.

???: You are cordially invited to participate in Mr. Andrew Fox's party.
Puzzles: ...Any relation to-
???: No realation to the actress.
Puzzles: Thank... God.
???: As does Mr. Fox.

I take the envelope. I was pretty sure I didn't know a "Andrew Fox". Especially one that could afford having fancy-pants guys dressed in black. Oh, yeah - he was wearing a black tuxedo. Not really sure why I'd need getting any more specific into it, but yeah - black tuxedo. Bet I just blew your minds right there, didn't I?

???: We hope you join us... Mr. Puzzles Enigma.

The man turned on his heels and walked into the darkness. ...Then into the lgiht, since, well - street lighting. Then into the darkness again. Then light. Then darkness. Then he turned around the corner.
I returned to my apartment, wondering what the hell just happened. But what I thought about the most was that black tuxedo. Was it Armani? And what kind of material was it made of? Did it smell nice? I spent hours mulling it over until my mind finally returned to the actual envelope. The "invitation". Hastily, I opened it (by "hastily", I mean I started opening it, got a paper cut, freaked out and then got some scissors) and skimmed over the contents. Here's a basic summary:

Yo Puzzles.

I know you've never heard of me and I know I'm being super ominous right now, what with the guy in that fancy tuxedo that I know you totally can't stop thinking about, but I'm here to invite you to my fancy mansion anyway so you can participate in a totally friendly, totally killing-free and totally not-suspicious party. I know this sounds like some Agatha Christie s/// right here, but I SWEAR it's not.

A. F.


So, naturally - with an invitation like that, who would refuse?!
Plus, it also mentioned something about free food, bedrooms and huge mansion, so... I suppose the other parts didn't really matter to me.

The next day, I took a taxi to the address provided and found myself arriving at a beautiful, stunning mansion. One worthy of describing for about two pages. It was so super-worthy of describing that I could spend days and paragraphs describing it. There was so much stuff worth describing and comparing to other describable stuff that I could never end describing this incredible feat of human work. It was so amazing that to this moment I don't think I had seen a more description-worthy mansion than this one. It was so stunning, so massive, so praise-worthy that would make that description... maybe even cross for another page! Oh, what an amazing mansion it was... What description I could do of it!

...But I'm just going to put this incredibly accurate picture of it here instead:
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(It might've also been raning that day. ...And it might've looked like it was nighttime, but it was totally around sunset.)

Let's face it, actually taking the time to describe stuff like this is a waste of time for both of us. I mean, I could've... But it's almost as if I have this need to rush through this as fast as possible... Almost like I'm doing all of this last minute... Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...

So, I stepped it to... protect myself from all the, uh... rain that was... raining dow- okay, I have a confession to make. It wasn't raining. And it didn't look like it was night, I mean, it wasn't super-bright either, since it was around sunset, but it wasn't really this dark, either.
...*Sniff*
THIS INCREDIBLY ACCURATE PICTURE ISN'T INCREDIBLY ACCURATE, OKAY?! I'VE BETRAYED YOUR TRUST!

...Hm, kind of sounded out of character there. Well, not that I'm a character, but I actually sounded like someone who was having fun his narration rather than someone who's miserable and completely screwed. Well - we can't have that. Just ignore the previous paragraph. ...Or else.

In any case, I entered the incredibily description-worthy mansion and found myself in what appeared to be some kind of giant lobby. I have no more pictures on me at the moment, so I'll just put mansion one again, just to remind myself to add it later:
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Sadly, the lobby wasn't as description-worthy as the outside - somewhere around a 7 or 8. But not the 10 that was the outside of the mansion.

In any case, I didn't even get a chance to stop freezing my ass off (it was December, by the way) when I was approached by what appeared to be a butler. He introduced himself as:

Jonathan: My name is Jonathan. I am Mr. Fox's personal butler.

I know I ruined the surprise by putting "Jonathan" right before he actually said his name was Jonathan, but... Eh. Wasting another nametag for "Butler" is actually a pain in the ass to do.

Puzzles: I'm...
Jonathan: Mr. Enigma! We've been expecting you!
Puzzles: ...How did you know who I was?
Jonathan: Ah, well... You're the only one that's left to show up - so I imagined that it must be you.
Puzzles: ...So I could've just been whoever and you would've assumed I was Puzzles Enigma?
Jonathan: Well, no - not if you put it like that, per-se...
Puzzles: I'm sure. So! Where's the party at?
Jonathan: Ah, right this way, sir.

Jonathan lead me to a small lounge of mediocre description-worthy-ness and introduced me to the other guests:

One was... Uh...
...
Hold on, I'll... I'll remember what they were called... Just... give me a second here...

...

Goddammit.
You know, it's hard to remember the names of people that died just hours later.
Also, spoilers, they all died. I know that's a major shock to you and that I've, yet again, ruined all that exists for you, but yeah - they were all going to die. Shame, too. They were all pretty good looking.

Ah! Right! I forgot to mention something important!
They were all women. Women which I'll... eh, screw it, I'll just do it like this: Angela, Betsy, Christina, Donna.

Angela was good-looking, but overall kind of... Eh... I'm kind of worried about saying the b-word, since... I mean, I was basically the only guy there, not counting Jonathan and... I mean, I don't know.
Alright - she didn't like me and treated me horribly, does that work? Okay, great. Luckily, fear not, dear reader/listener/whatever you are at this point, for I treated her horribly, as well.

Next up was Betsy. She was also good-looking, but she seemed rather quiet and shy - generally seemed like she didn't want to be here. Frankly, I could understand why. Being in a huge-ass mansion with a guy dressed as a butler called "Jonathan" (apologies to everyone called "Jonathan". I'm sorry you were named that way.) and the owner nowhere in sight? I'd get somewhat scared, too.

Third was Christina. What she lacked in looks, she made up in bust size. Neeext!

Finally, there was Donna. ...She kinda reminded me of Donna Troy from DC Comics, looking back at it... Hm... Oh, don't worry if you don't get the reference. Since I'm expecting you to open up a new tab and google the name, see how she looks and learn the backstory. Then possibly get hooked on comics, learn everything there is to know about comic books and become one of those, whatchamacallthem "geeks". I'm not gonna do all the work for you, jeez.

Angela: So... Where is Mr. Fox, anyway?
Christina: I think the better question is - WHO is Mr. Fox?
Puzzles: ...What, you don't know?
Betsy: W-What, you do?!
Puzzles: Er... No, but I'd imagine if you took the invitation of showing up to his party, you'd at least know who's mansion you were going to!
Donna: ...But you're here.
Puzzles: Yeah, and?
Angela: ...And you just said that you didn't know who he was, either.
Puzzles: Well, yeah, but you're WOMEN, so naturally...

You know, in retrospect, I think I know why Angela didn't quite like me...

Jonathan: Actually... I'm afraid I have an important announcement to make. Ladies... Mr. Enigma... Mr. Fox I have recieved a call from Mr. Fox. He said he apologizes, but that he will not be able to make this party. He, however, wishes that you explore the mansion freeley and have as much fun as possible. You are free to leave at any time...
Angela: Well, I'm leaving.
Jonathan: ...Is what he SAID. However, I regret to inform you that a giant storm is suddenly taking place outside and we've lost all phone connection - hence, I'm unable to call you a taxi.
Angela: Great...
Jonathan: In any case, I wish you the most fun this fine evening. If you need me, I will be going to my servant's room where I will NOT be killed a few hours later.

Chapter Trois


So a few hours later we found Jonathan dead. We went to the servant's room (because Christina realized there were no Doritos or something), found the door locked and I, being the manly man that I was, told Angela to break it down. She kinda got angry so I figured that the best course of action might be to just break it down for myself.

So, I broke it down and, surprise, surprise, we found Jonathan, laying on the table, in the center of the room, with a knife sticking out of his chest. The room had no windows and there didn't seem a way to hide in it. The additional issue was the fact that all five of us were in the lounge, discussing the genius that was "The Room". Since the lounge is so small and mediocre in its description, we always had each other in sights - hence, it would've been impossible for one of us to go and murder this guy. Another problem was that, after giving the body a search, we found the key to the room (I can say this with 100% certainty, since Angela insisted we make sure it's actually the key to the room).

I also made a short trip to the kitchen (which took me around 20 minutes, since - you know, huge mansion), got a knife, went back and stabbed him in the chest - just to be sure that he's actually dead. He didn't react or anything, so I imagine he really was.

Now, I could take this time to provide character development and backstory, get you invested in these characters -- make you really care and enjoy them...
...Or I could just skip to the next death. Yeah, let's do that.

So, like all good Scooby-Doo mysteries, we decided to split up - I got Angela in my group. Yaaaaaay. (In retrospect, I think they thought I was the killer and wanted me to do a world a favor. ...Or maybe it was the other way around.) The other three formed their own group and went to search one half of the mansion. We got the other.

In any case, we were walking down a super creepy hallway when suddenly...
BANG!

We heard a gunshot. In case you couldn't figure that out from the "BANG!" part.

We ran to the other side of the mansion and found... Christina, dead, in the middle of the hallway. A bullet hole through her head. Angela checked her pulse - nadda. Betsy and Donna came right after us. We asked what happened.

Betsy: W-We were in the kitchen when... S-S-Sh... She ran upstairs... S-S-Said she had to go to the bathroom... T-That she could handle herself...
Donna: Yeah... S-She totally didn't run upstairs to look for Doritos...
Puzzles: And you were together the entire time?
Donna: That, I can promise you.
Puzzles: ...You can promise me a question?
Donna: ...No, that we were together the entire time.
Puzzles: You don't say...
Donna: What about you two?
Angela: As much as I hate to admit it, he was next to me the entire time...
Puzzles: ...I was? Oh, thank God, I actually stopped paying attention to you!

The gun was nowhere to be seen. We showed all our pockets and generally searched each other - nope, no gun. Wasn't that simply fantastic?

We decided to hold up in the lounge - that way the culprit couldn't get to us. We locked the door from the inside (we found a key in the servant's room), made sure only the four of us were in the room, made sure there were no secret passages or anything of that nonsense, covered the window with the couch (Donna's far stronger than you'd think) and then we each took a corner of the room - having all four of us in each other's sights. We gave the key to the room to Betsy. Another advantage we had was that turning the key in the doorknob made a loud noise, so we'd know if someone was getting in. It seemed like we'd done it - foiled the killer's plan, right?

Oh, come on.
It's never that easy.

The lights went out. We heard a scream. And when the lights came back on... Angela was dead.

Puzzles: OH MY GOD! ...THANK YOU!

She was laying in her corner, stabbed through the heart, a lot like how Jeremy... no, wait - his name was Jonathan, sorry - a lot like Jonathan was. I checked the door.

Puzzles: Still locked...

Betsy showed us that she still had the key. She swore she didn't move. Checked Angela's pulse - no dice, still dead. (Yes!) At this point, Betsy became so panicked that she unlocked the lounge door and ran outside.
Haven't seen her since.

The only people left were me... and Donna.

Donna: There must be another person here.
Puzzles: Does it matter? Even if there was, there's no way they could've killed Jonathan and... Angela here. Not to mention, we searched the entire mansion, remember (scene available in the Director's Cut of this story)? There is nobody else here. The killer has to be one of us.
Donna: True... But what about Christina's murder? We were with each other the entire time!
Puzzles: One of the two groups was the killer/accomplice combo!
Donna: I'm not the killer - NOR am I an accomplice! That only leaves you and Angela!
Puzzles: In case you didn't notice, Angela's dead!
Donna: Because YOU backstabbed and killed her!
Puzzles: No, you and Betsy are the ones responsible and she just ran away because she couldn't live with the guilt! Complex character development!
Donna: You're the only living male here!
Puzzles: What does that have to do with anything?!
Donna: We were all invited here by a "Mr. Fox"!
Puzzles: So?! For all we know, it could've been a woman pretending to be a man! Wouldn't surprise me! That was clearly a diversion on your part!

As I said that, I noticed that Donna had gotten a terrified look in her eyes. I imagined that someone was probably behind me about to murder me, so I instinctively turned around and...

Black.
Nothing.
Gone.

...So here I am now. Pouting in... nothingness, I guess.
Being really annoyed that it's my decisions that brought me here.
Knew I shouldn't have gone out for that walk.
Knew I shouldn't have accepted that invitation.
Knew I shouldn't have let Angela exist.
Knew deep down that this was all Shirley's fault.

Chapter I kinda forgot how you do "Four" in French, and I was too lazy and embarrassed to Google it


"No... It's not over yet!" I hear a voice call out to me in the darkness. The lights come back on and I suddenly found myself in a white room. In front of me... A school girl. Strange, could've sworn the voice was male. She(?) looks at me through the bangs of her orange her - her blue eyes piercing right into mine.

"Er... Hello.", I say, mildly confused and annoyed at what was happening.
"Don't 'Hello' me!", she says, but AGAIN - I could swear that the voice is male! "Do you know what you've done here?!", she asks me.

...I realize what's going on. Don't know why I shouldn't. After all - I know who that is.

"Hello... enigma.", I say, regaining my composure.
"What... Have you done?!", he asks me (and yes, it's a "he").
"I don't know what you're talking about..."
"You... You ruined Puzzles! You took his character and turned him from... from..."
"A dick to an even bigger dick?"
"YES!"
"...Sorry. Not my intention. Well, okay - it was. You gotta admit, it was pretty funny."
"P-PRETTY FUNNY?! Are you insane?!"
"I don't know. I'm not the one cosplaying as Rena, you know..."
"Ngh... You... You...!"

Oh, right, I should probably take this time to clarify something.
I'm not Puzzles Enigma. Yes, I know I already said my last name isn't "Enigma", but I'm not really "Puzzles", either. I'm the author of this tale, you see. I've taken over this character's body and decided to go for a little joyride with him. Did you enjoy it?

"Well, enigma? Did you enjoy it?"
"N-No!"
"...Oh? But look at this mystery! Look at the murders, the locked rooms, the impossible crimes!"
"There's nothing 'impossible' or even interesting about these excuse for locked rooms!"
"Hm? Is that so... Well, then... What do you say for some good ol' fashioned Red vs. Blue?"
"You... Ruined my character... Made a short story about him that was horribly written... Ngh... YOU'RE ON!"
"Hmph. Let's see what you're made of."
"I was always better at this than you, you know!"
"...Hey. I like to think I've improved."
"Perfect example of a delusional mind!"
"Hmph. Whatever. Well, then? Your first blue, if you don't mind? Preferrably one starring the culprit?"
"Please. That's the easiest part. The culprit is...!"

TO BE CONTINUED


"...Are you even serious."
"Aaah... It's good to be the narrator."
Spoiler : Wolf Speaker :
The Wolf Parable
a Random Bit of Writing
by Your IF
Beginning

Scene 1: General Chatting

Curtain up. Spotlights on WOLF and SLEUTH, other AAO MEMBERS in background. Wolf and Sleuth are sitting in lounge chairs, the former reading a magazine, the latter drawing.

AAO Member 1: *Rushes to the front of the stage* People, people! I have an amazingly huge announcement!

Wolf: What, what is it?

AAO Member 2: Yes, please tell us! *a general murmur of assent comes from the crowd*

AAO Member 1: The new section, Roleplays, is now open! *gasps from crowd*

AAO Member 3: A new section? I’ve never heard of anything like this. *continued murmur from crowd after this*

Sleuth: Roleplays, huh?

Wolf: It’s very exciting, don’t you think?

Sleuth: I’m not going to be the one to create the first topic. Or the however-many-roleplays-there-are-on-AAOth one.

Wolf: Neither am I. We’ll let someone easily excitable take it.

Sleuth: Like Tap.

Wolf: Tap’s a nice choice.

Enter UNAS, carrying a sign reading “RP Section Open”, in his hand. The crowd watches him as he sets it down and hammers it into the ground, then leaves.

AAO Member 1: It’s official!

AAO Member 3: I’m not gonna miss the grand opening! *runs offstage, along with other AAO MEMBERS*

Wolf: Would you like to go?

Sleuth: I’m not that interested.

Wolf: Ah. Your drawing? What is it?

Sleuth: Just some practice drawings of a character.

Wolf: And who would this character be?

Sleuth: That’s a secret. *he grins, and WOLF grins back*

Spotlight darkens on SLEUTH. WOLF walks to the front of the stage.

Wolf: The year is 2014. The month is January. I am Wolf Speaker, and I am about to be murdered. I know this because... I am speaking from the heavens.

A “BANG” is heard. WOLF falls dead.

Scene 2: AAO Police Department

Enter MEPH, SLEUTH. ENIGMA is sitting at a receptionist’s desk.

Meph: We are here to report a dead body.

Enigma: A dead body? Cool!

Sleuth: *nearly driven to tears* Not cool! It’s one of our very own!

Meph: Wolf Speaker was killed. A team dispatch was teleported in immediately, and Sleuth was found with the body. We need our resident detective on the scene.

Kwando: *from offstage* And his Watson?

Enter DWAM and KWANDO, both wearing sunglasses and in snappy suits.

DWaM: I am Detective Dylan Mask. You may call me DWaM.

Enigma: How did your cell unlock? Ever since you killed Kroki, you’ve been locked in there!

DWaM: Kwando here busted me out. I sensed a disturbance in General Chatting, so I called him on my cell.

Enigma: Blast! We never should’ve let you in the slammer with that thing.

DWaM: I have just one thing to say to that. Lol.

Everyone: Enigma.
Sleuth: We should get to the point. You absolutely must find Wolf’s killer or else Ace Attorney Online will collapse upon itself!

Meph: A house divided against itself cannot stand. I’m British, by the way.

Enigma: We’ll send the detectives over to Gen. Chatting before the day is out.

DWaM: By “before the day is out” he means right now. Kwando! Come.

All but ENIGMA exit.

Enigma: Everything is according to plan... They’ll never catch the true killer, not as long as I live! Ahahahhahahahahahhahah! AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA!

Wolf: *has been watching* DWaM and kwando were to find my killer. They began by investigating the body.

Scene 3: General Chatting

Enter DWAM, KWANDO, and SLEUTH. WOLF is lying dead on the floor.

DWaM: She appears to have been shot in the heart once... Entry wound is on the back, exit on the front. Angle of wound one hundred and fifty degrees towards the ground. Kwando! Any unusual observations?

Kwando: No blood, other than on the body.

DWaM: Exactly. That must mean someone wiped up the blood. Assuming the murder took place about 25 minutes ago, and I left for General Chatting about 5 minutes ago... That gives the murderer about 15 minutes to go and wipe up the blood.

Sleuth: Do you think there were any witnesses?

DWaM: Gather up all the people lingering behind from the rush to Roleplays. They should still be in this section.

Sleuth: Got it. *he exits*

Kwando: Well, Detective. Any theories?

DWaM: None yet. Check the victim’s personal effects. *spotlight on WOLF*

Wolf: They rummaged through my clothing and found one drawing, of a wolf mother and her cub. It’s one of my better drawings, if I do say so myself. Apart from that, nothing suspicious was found. *spotlight on DWAM*

DWaM: Right. There’s one thing we need to do right now, and that’s find the murder weapon. If the culprit’s smart, they’ll have wiped the prints and hid the weapon discreetly. Kwando, if you could be a dear and go find it for me...?

Kwando: That’s fine. *he exits, SLEUTH comes back with GAV, CHAOS, WACKY, GUARDIANDREAMER, FURY, and BAD PLAYER*

Sleuth: This appears to be everyone.

DWaM: Good. So only you seven were in General Chatting at the time of the murder... Immediately after the murder, the whole section went into lockdown, so one of you seven must be the murderer.

BP: Or Wolf herself!

Sleuth: She’d never do that! Stop thinking those things!

BP: We can’t eliminate the possibility!

DWaM: Suicide is a possibility, albeit a very unlikely one. Look at the angle of the wound and it’ll tell all. *they examine the wound*

Chaos: The ground’s flat, so...

Fury: If it were suicide, the angle would’ve been straight on.

DWaM: Exactly. I’ve sent kwando to find the missing murder weapon; that is, the gun. We’ll wait here until he’s back. *Kwando enters in a panic*

Kwando: I found the gun! When I tested it for prints (making sure not to touch it of course) the only prints found were Sleuth’s!

Sleuth: But I didn’t do it!

DWaM: We never said you did?

Kwando: It’s the most likely possibility at the moment. Take a gander at this theory, Detective.

Gav: Ooh, a Confrontation!

Fury: Most likely!

Wacky: I hope lots of zany AA things happen!

Sleuth: Don’t kill the mood!

Gav: Sorry...

Kwando: ...Like I was saying...

Confrontation - kwando1313
Sleuth Did It!

Sleuth did it! It has to be him!
There’s a ton of evidence against him!
Look at the fingerprints on the gun! Sleuth touched it at some point.
He could’ve easily shot Wolf from where he was sitting.

DWaM: That’s a very interesting argument.

Chaos: I don’t think it’s very right, though...

BP: First arguments never are.

DWaM: Hush! GD, point out the flaw in this argument.

GD: Me? You’re the detective, you know.

DWaM: It’s a simple flaw. Point it out.

Kwando: Hey! I’m no amateur!

DWaM: Don’t worry. The arguments will get better as they go along. It always works that way.

Kwando: Hmph...

GD: Okay, so... Um... If Sleuth shot Wolf from where he was sitting, it would’ve been impossible to make it so that the wound on her back was angled downward... It would’ve been angled upward instead.

Gav: But isn’t it impossible for that to have happened? Wolf was sitting do -

Fury: She was standing up. Look at the position of the body.

Kwando: Oh... How could I have missed that?

Chaos: First argument syndrome.

Wacky: Gets you every time.

Kwando: I’m not done yet, though! I can prove Sleuth did it!

DWaM: Oh, brother...

Confrontation - kwando1313
Sleuth Did It! - 2

It’s simple! Sleuth stood up to shoot Wolf!
He’s about three centimeters taller than her, so that explains the angle.
Then, all he would have to do would be to hide the gun somewhere...
...using the help of one of the people in this room!
Yes, he had an accomplice! It’s that simple!

DWaM: Wacky, you take this one.

Wacky: You’re passing these off to everyone!

GD: There’s probably a method to his madness.

Kwando: There’s always a method to this detective’s madness!

Sleuth: I’ve seen him in action myself!

BP: Oh, yeah, when Kroki was murdered! Who would’ve thought that the mystery accomplice was -

DWaM: Bad memories. Don’t bring them up.

BP: Hah.

Wacky: Okay, I’ll give it a try.

Chaos: Don’t give up! For Patchy!

Wacky: No, Chaos. No. Anyway. The dispatch team was sent mere milliseconds after Wolf’s murder. They always are. Any accomplices would’ve been seen running off to hide the murder weapon!

Kwando: Ack!

DWaM: And you’re forgetting the other contradiction. Any sane accomplice would’ve wiped the prints off the gun, but Sleuth’s prints are still on it. Therefore, either Sleuth is the accomplice or his prints were planted there!

Kwando: W-wait! The gun was found near the entrance to Forum Games! How could it have gotten there if Wolf was shot that accurately? The gun would have to have been shot from there, and it’s pretty hard to hit straight through the heart!

DWaM: Yes, indeed. This is something we’ll need to look into.

Gav: So what do we do now?

Fury: I suppose we take witness statements...

DWaM: That seems to be the best thing to do at the moment. There were seven people in the section at the time, and they had to have been somewhere.

Kwando: I’ll write down the statements.

Chaos: I’ll start.

Mob Confrontation - The Seven Suspects
Witness Statements

Chaos: I was in the Rant thread, responding to a post by SE.
Wacky: I was over by the entrance to Video Games, sipping tea in a lounge chair.
BP: I was brainstorming for a new case in a random chair.
Sleuth: I was sitting by Wolf, practicing my drawing.
Gav: I was browsing the latest posts in the Topic of Randomness.
Fury: I was sitting across from Wolf, my nose buried in a book.
GD: I was by the entrance to Forum Games, looking up VNs on one of the public computers.

DWaM: Fury, did you happen to see anyone suspicious?

Fury: My nose was buried in a book, wasn’t it? I didn’t see anyone.

DWaM: Sleuth, same question posed to Fury.

Sleuth: Absolutely nobody. When I heard the gunshot, it messed up my drawing...

DWaM: What were you drawing, out of curiosity?

Sleuth: A character.

DWaM: Wacky, why were you by the entrance to Video Games?

Wacky: I was waiting for someone, actually.

DWaM: Can you tell me who?

Wacky: Um... No... It’s actually not very important, so...

DWaM: Gav, did you see anyone suspicious?

Gav: When I came out of the Topic of Randomness, I saw that everyone had leapt to their feet.

DWaM: Everyone in this room except me and Kwando?

Gav: What you said.

DWaM: GD, why by the entrance to Forum Games in particular?

GD: That computer is a computer I enjoy using, so I used it.

DWaM: That’s where the gun was found. Any comment?

GD: My fingerprints would be on the gun if I touched it, wouldn’t they? I had nothing to do with that.

DWaM: Chaos, when you came out of the Rant thread, did you see anything suspicious?

Chaos: Everyone but Gav, who had just come out of the ToR across from me, had leapt to their feet.

DWaM: Was anything in disarray?

Chaos: Just the room.

DWaM: BP, what’s your case about?

BP: A shooting.

DWaM: Yeah I love you too. *BP grins*

Kwando: Detective, there’s absolutely nothing contradictory!

DWaM: And so there’s nothing to be found in these statements... Let’s search the area in which the gun was found. We’ll all move as a group so nobody else gets hurt.

Scene 4: Forum Games Entrance

Kwando: This is where the gun was found. *points to behind a computer*

GD: That’s the computer I was using earlier.

Kwando: Are you to tell me you didn’t notice this gun?!

GD: ...Maybe. I don’t pay much attention to things around me when dealing with VNs. I like to get immersed.

DWaM: Don’t pay much attention, hmm? Well, that gun would have to have gotten there somehow.

Chaos: Maybe someone teleported it in?

DWaM: ...Only the mods can do that. Are you saying a mod did it?

Wacky: Mods -can- do anything... It’s no secret that they could kill someone from afar and make it look like a gunshot.

MEPH teleports in.

Meph: How dare you! To think that one of the mods is a possible culprit? All of us were in a meeting at the time of the crime!

BP: Except me, because trial reviewers don’t matter for some reason.

Meph: What are you talking about? You were the - oh that’s right you weren’t.

BP: I wasn’t.

Fury: BP technically isn’t a mod, so...

DWaM: This line of questioning is irrelevant.

Kwando: Sir, we’re not in court.

DWaM: Meph, I request that you find out if anyone on the moderation team is suspicious.

Meph: Done and done... *teleports away*

Spotlight on WOLF.

Wolf: Meph continued to valiantly search for my killer while I lay on the floor. The others began to search the area around the Forum Games entrance, and in fifteen minutes, they reconvened.

DWaM: Alright, let’s see what everyone’s found.

Kwando: Detective, wouldn’t someone have tampered with the evidence if they found any? One of these people is most likely the killer, after all.

DWaM: That’s a risk we have to take. Fury, what did you find?

Fury: I checked near the computers. I found a dry painting with a red wolf on it.

BP: A red wolf? How curious. I found the same drawing under a seat cushion.

DWaM: So that makes three wolf drawings...

Fury: And what’s more, the letter “B” is on the back of this. Is there anything on the back of yours, BP?

BP: Lesse... The letter “P”... Ah!

Chaos: BP! What do you have to say for yourself!

Wacky: That’s certainly some evidence...

A murmur spreads through the group...

DWaM: Hold! *everyone is silent* BP, do you have any idea as to why your name, or in this case, initials, would be on those drawings?

BP: I have no idea about anything, Tective.

DWaM: Do you have any connection to the drawings at all?

BP: I don’t think soooooo...

GD: Serious answers, please.

Kwando: What he said.

BP: Nope!

DWaM: Is there anyone who could’ve tried to frame you?

BP: *slaps Kwando*

Kwando: Ow, what was that for?

DWaM: I don’t think Kwands tried to frame you for some reason.

Kwando: Yeah! I wasn’t even in General Chatting when the murder occurred!
BP: I never implied that you were the killer.

Fury: Shut it, BP.

Gav: Yeah, shut it, BP!

Chaos: Gav please.

DWaM: AS I WAS SAYING. BP, as long as you do not provide sufficient explanation for those letters, then you are my prime suspect.

BP: I seriously don’t know anything about them!

DWaM: Sigh...

GD: You’re not even sighing. You’re just saying the word “sigh”.

DWaM: Moving on... Chaos, did you find anything?

Chaos: Wacky and I searched together, and we found nothing.

Gav: I found a bullet by the entrance to Media -

DWaM: Kwando check how many bullets were fired now!

Kwando: Yes sir! *checks* Looks like two bullets were fired, sir!

DWaM: Did anyone hear a second gunshot? *everyone shakes their head*

Gav: It’s stone cold...

GD: It shouldn’t be. This place is kept at 72 degrees Fahrenheit consistently.

Wacky: Does that mean a second gunshot was fired outside?

DWaM: It’s certainly a possibility.

Sleuth: Can I speak up? I haven’t talked for a while now.

Fury: You haven’t talked much at all.

Sleuth: Hey, thanks for that. Anyway, I searched the entire room and came up with... This. *holds out his evidence*

Spotlight on WOLF.

Wolf: He had found my sketchpad, stained with blood and placed in a potted plant in the corner of General Chatting’s lobby.

Sleuth: This is most likely Wolf’s blood. I had the forensics department run a quick test on it while the others were still searching, and it’s a perfect match with no visible signs of tampering. Wolf always keeps her sketchpad in her room, where nobody can get to it... This is very irregular.

Gav: But we all have locks on our rooms, and we were instructed not to give our keys to anyone!

Sleuth: So either Wolf gave away her key, she invited someone in, or the key was stolen.

DWaM: Either the first or third possibility. I didn’t find a key on the body, and there’s no chance someone could’ve stolen it after death.

Kwando: That’s correct. I monitored the body while you guys were investigating the lobby; nobody suspicious could’ve come and taken the key.

Sleuth: And I think I now have a pretty good idea of who the murderer is!

Fury: Who?!

Chaos: Yes, tell us. *a murmur of assent from the crowd*

Sleuth: Well, it all started three days ago...

Confrontation - Sleuth
Three Days Ago

Three days ago, I was wandering the hall Wolf’s room is on.
I saw Fury loitering by Wolf’s room suspiciously, so I stopped to look in.
I hid around a corner and saw Wolf invite Fury into her room!
About thirty minutes later, Fury came out, and there was a small bulge in his back pocket...
It had to have been the sketchpad! There’s no other explanation!
When the pad showed up, covered with blood, I immediately thought back to this.
Fury’s the only one who could’ve planted it by the entrance to Media.

DWaM: Kwando, send for a fingerprint test.

Kwando: Got it.

About three minutes pass...

Kwando: I’ve got the results! Wolf’s fingerprints are on the sketchpad, as expected, but so are Fury’s!

Fury: I never laid my hands on that sketchpad!

Kwando: I’m not done... The other fingerprints we found were that of Tap.

Gav: But Tap and Wolf are the most well-known couple here! Of course his fingerprints are on the sketchpad!

Chaos: It makes you wonder, though, doesn’t it?

Fury: I never. Laid my hands. On that sketchpad!

Kwando: Nobody ever said you did. Maybe you touched it by accident?

DWaM: Hold! *silence* Good.

GD: Have you found a contradiction?

BP: I certainly have! How did Wolf’s blood get on the sketchpad?

Sleuth: Ack! How did it get on the sketchpad...?

Fury: I never laid my -

Kwando: I think we all know your position by now.

Gav: Maybe it fell on the body by accident?

Chaos: Remember the mod teleportation squad...

Wacky: So how did blood get on the sketchpad?

DWaM: I have a theory... When I killed Kroki, maybe Wolf was killed instead!

...

BP: Your theories have reached a new low.

DWaM: What? I’m serious! Send for a blood te -

Kwando: No need. I already checked.

BP: Kinky!

Gav: No.

Kwando: Actually, it was kinda ki -

DWaM: Moving on, we know that the corpse is definitely Wolf, unless Kroki was secretly a girl.

Chaos: I doubt that.

Wacky: As do I.

Gav: They really are a couple!

Fury: Hush, Gav! Now is not the time.

DWaM: MOVING ON. There still lies the problem of how the blood got on the sketchpad, and what the bulge in Fury’s pants was.

BP: I have several different theories to that last part~

GD: Everyone got those theories? Good, now never speak of them again.

Everyone but GD and BP: Yes, sir.

BP: *pouts*

DWaM: Fury, I’m afraid we need testimony from you. Just what was the bulge? And what were you doing in Wolf’s room?

Fury: I can answer those questions in a jiffy!

Confrontation - Fury
Me and Wolf

I never laid my hands on that sketchpad!
When I went into Wolf’s room three days ago, it was a friendly conversation.
We talked about many trivial things, then something unexpected happened...
My planner had been missing that week, and Wolf had found it.
She gave it to me. That must’ve been what the bulge in my back pocket was.
I don’t know how the sketchpad got to the entrance of Media and Entertainment, honest!

DWaM: How big is the planner?

Fury: Big enough to fit in my back pocket, that’s for sure.

Sleuth: It just filled the pocket, so I couldn’t see the top...

DWaM: The sketchpad is about a foot tall, so... EUREKA!

Kwando: What? What is it, detective?

Spotlight on WOLF

Wolf: What I heard from the beyond just then wasn’t a brilliant deduction, but from what had gone on in that room until then, it certainly seemed like one.

DWaM: Sleuth! Your comment has just made me have a major breakthrough!

Sleuth: That’s good, I guess.

Chaos: Stop screwing around and tell us! *assent from group*

DWaM: Fury! Was the sketchpad still in Wolf’s room when you went to visit her?

Fury: Yes! Wolf was drawing on it when I entered.

DWaM: Then that means the sketchpad was stolen... IN THIS THREE DAY TIME PERIOD!

Wacky: Mind equals blown?

Kwando: Yeah, any old fool could make that deduction.

DWaM: You don’t see what I see. And I see those two drawings! BP!

BP: On it. *takes out drawing and steals other drawing* Detective, with all due respect, if you’re thinking to test these for prints...

DWaM: I’m not thinking of that.

Gav: Then what are you thinking of?

DWaM: It’s simple, really. These drawings should be tested for prints, but not for someone’s fingerprints... But for the age of the prints. This will tell us when Wolf had the sketchpad last!

GD: I see! Depending on the age of the prints, we can deduce when the sketchpad was stolen!

Kwando: I’ll send the prints in! I’ll meet you at Wolf’s room’s hallway, everyone!

DWaM: ...Isn’t that slightly arbitrary?

Chaos: Y’know...

Kwando: It’s the closest place I can think of that’s related to the crime, other than the crime scene, from the police station.

DWaM: Fine... Then we’ll meet you there.

Spotlight on WOLF.

Wolf: They were about to uncover something great... Something that would shake their perception of the case. And it was to be found in my room.

The Wolf Parable
To be continued...

Middle, Part 1

Scene 1: AAO Dorm Room - 5F

Enter the crowd from most of the Beginning, minus KWANDO. GD is leading the crowd.

GD: So, where’s Wolf’s dorm?

BP: I thought you would’ve found out by now. It’s on -

Chaos: Noooooooooooooooo. No.

BP: 5FFFFFFFFFF -

Wacky: Chaos shoot him!

Chaos: Fury shoot him!

Fury: Gav shoot him!

Gav: ...Why are you all looking at me?

DWaM: We’re here. You can all stop walking now.

Sleuth: But we’d already stopped walking... This is Wolf’s room.

Fury: Yep, I’ve definitely been here before.

Sleuth: We’ll need a mod to unlock the door.

DWaM: Kwands has probably thought of that.

GD: At the very least, he’s gotten the info we need.

Gav: Isn’t Kwando supposed to be the bumbling Watson type?

BP: That means he’s stupid!

Gav: Hey, don’t diss the Kwandsinator!

DWaM: Please never call him that again...

Pause.

DWaM: I need someone to interrogate. Everyone tell me your favorite color now.

Sleuth: Blue!

Gav: Purple.

BP: Tan~

Chaos: Green.

Wacky: Red.

Fury: White!

GD: My favorite color, thus being such an expression, is thoust maroon, with a dash of black, making thy favorite color one of darkenest twilight.

...

GD: Who’s writing this? I do not sound like that.

BP: Sure you don’t...
DWaM: I didn’t need a Shakespaerean speech. I just needed something to pass the time.

Fury: Well, time has successfully passed. Anything else you want out of us?

DWaM: Name, address...

Chaos: Fat chance.

Kwando: *from offstage* I’m baaack! *enters* And I have the results! Now... These could be very shocking to some of you, but...

Sleuth: With one T.

Kwando: Thanks for that. No prints were found on either drawing. Looks like the killer wiped them down good!

DWaM: This is very troubling. Did you also get a key to Wolf’s room?

Kwando: In fact, I did! Here ya go. *hands key to DWAM*

Gav: I wonder what’ll be inside...

GD: We’re about to find out what is inside this doorway to Wolf’s soul! I still don’t talk like that...

BP: Kiiinkyyyyy!

Everyone: Shut it!

DWaM: I am now unlocking the door. *unlocks door*

Scene 2: Wolf’s Room

Sleuth: Look! On the sheets of her bed! It’s a note!

Chaos: Let’s see what it says.

DWaM: Get back! I’ll read. AAAHEM. “Dear AAO, I have decided to commit suicide. Don’t worry, I didn’t commit suicide IRL. By ‘commit suicide’ I mean to take a short leave from AAO. My family’s going on vacation! :D -Wolf”

Fury: That was underwhelming.

Kwando: And in poor taste. I mean, seriously! Wolf couldn’t have written that!

GD: It was in poor taste, but that’s not what’s at stake here.

DWaM: And we can’t tell who wrote the note on taste alone.

Gav: *cough*BP*cough*

BP: Did you say “Glorious and All-Powerful BP?” Cause that’s what I heard~

Chaos: Moving on!

DWaM: We’ll need to dust for prints on everything in the room.

Wacky: You mean like dusting the room? Like maids?

Fury: It’s Rune’s fantasy!

BP: Oh my gosh, Furs, only Ryuu gets to say that!

Gav: Since when did you two switch personalities?

DWaM: Hey, hey, not like maids or anything! Now, this’ll take a few hours, so lay low for a while. Go to the waiting room or something. *everyone but DWaM and KWANDO exit*

Kwando: So, where’s the fingerprinting kit?

DWaM: I’m not trying to dust for anything. I want to see if anyone else will be murdered in the waiting room. As it is, we don’t have enough evidence to form a solid case against anyone...

Kwando: We should still investigate the room... *peeks in a drawer* Hey, what’s this?

DWaM: What is it?

Kwando: It looks like a bunch of extra sketchpads...

DWaM: ...That opens up many possibilities. Why don’t we check them out?

Kwando: On it. Here’s one. *DWAM flips through it*

DWaM: Looks like Wolf hasn’t sketched in these at all, judging from the emptiness of this first one.

Kwando: But what if the drawings came from one of the pads?

DWaM: That’s something we’ll need to look for. Check for rip marks inside these pads.
*he checks*

Kwando: Nada.

DWaM: Then we can assume the drawings came from the sketchpad Wolf was regularly using at the time of her murder.

Kwando: Would it be easy for someone to mistake one of these sketchpads for Wolf’s?

DWaM: The murderer could’ve hid all but one of them elsewhere in the room as a ploy, to drive suspicion onto someone else... Of course, that would mean that two people went into Wolf’s room!

Kwando: Someone other than Sleuth, ya mean?

DWaM: This is intriguing... We’ll need to dust for prints on these sketchpads! Get a dusting kit, now!

Kwando: I’ll do so!

DWaM: In the meantime, I’ll call everyone back here, one at a time, and interrogate them. It’s time to bring the saga of this murder to an end.

Kwando: I highly doubt it’ll end, somehow... *he exits*

DWaM: Send Fury back in!

*enter FURY*

Fury: Hello... What do you want, DWaM?

DWaM: It has recently come to our attention that some evidence may have a different meaning than it has had before. Please, tell me again what you did the other day inside Wolf’s room.

Fury: Gladly.

Confrontation - Fury
Me and Wolf

I never laid my hands on that sketchpad!
When I went into Wolf’s room three days ago, it was a friendly conversation.
We talked about many trivial things, then something unexpected happened...
My planner had been missing that week, and Wolf had found it.
She gave it to me. That must’ve been what the bulge in my back pocket was.
I don’t know how the sketchpad got to the entrance of Media and Entertainment, honest!

DWaM: First of all, what was Wolf’s purpose for calling you into the room?

Fury: To talk with me about the planner, I guess. She didn’t say much about why, she just called me in.

DWaM: Then why do you suppose she would’ve talked with you trivially?

Fury: She’s in love with Tap already. I doubt it was for romantic interests.

DWaM: I didn’t mention romance.

Fury: H-hey! Neither did I!

DWaM: (Something’s brewing here.) Go on, please.

Fury: Of course I will! Um... I mean, yes, I will. I honestly have no idea why Wolf would talk with me like that...

DWaM: Was anything out of the ordinary when you were in Wolf’s room?

Fury: You know, come to think of it, I did notice something!

DWaM: Aha! So you were in the room before Wolf invited you in!

Fury: Aah! I can’t believe I fell for that. Anyway, Wolf’s blankets are usually red or yellow, depending on whichever one is in the wash, but when I went inside the room that day, the blanket was green.

DWaM: Do you have any idea as to why this would be so?

Fury: Spilled paint? Detergent accident? Guacamole? You tell me.

DWaM: Alright, one last question. What does your planner look like?

Fury: It’s brown, with a diamond design on the front and black-ringed.

DWaM: Kind of like this? *pulls out an extra sketchpad*

Fury: Yes, exactly like that!

DWaM: Interesting... Tell me, did you check your planner after you got it back?

Fury: I’m kind of a klutz, so I promptly lost it again. I never checked it.
DWaM: This, my friend, is a sketchpad. An extra sketchpad, found in one of Wolf’s drawers. I now consider it highly likely that our victim did not call you in to give you a planner, but to do something else entirely!

*spotlight on WOLF*

Wolf: He’d caught me. But I wasn’t about to tell anyone living what my real reason was, including the real reason for this mystery.

Fury: WHAT?! So that means Wolf had an ulterior motive for all this! But what could it be?

DWaM: Thank you for your time. Bring everyone back.

Fury: Alright... Whatever you want, it sure is complicated. *exit FURY, enter KWANDO*

Kwando: I’ve got the dusting kit!

DWaM: Hide it under the bed. I’m going to talk with everyone about the events of the murder.

Kwando: Have you gleaned any new information from Fury?

DWaM: I believe that Wolf had a different motive for calling Fury into her room than what we thought.

Kwando: And why do you think so?

DWaM: The sketchpads have the same design as Fury’s planner, and he never actually checked the supposed “found” item.

Kwando: That’s interesting.

*enter SLEUTH, FURY, BP, GD, CHAOS, WACKY, GAV*

Sleuth: Alright, spit it out. Have you found the killer?

DWaM: I have not found the killer, but I do have a wild theory. Namely, that Wolf was trying to do something very interesting related to Fury. Here’s a sketchpad I found in the draw - don’t get too excited it’s just an extra. Fury’s planner is the same style. Do the math.

BP: Ya think she was trying to do something murder-related?

Kwando: Of course. DWaM, explain please.

(There. Whew!)
Spoiler : MonoBear :
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Spoiler : Dave :
A Sonnet about a Poem’s Pure Heart

Her heart beats, delivering emotions to me.
Outward figure may not be smooth, but her appearance indefinitely shines.
The words she says may not make everyone agree,
But my own heart skips a beat when I hear her rhymes.
Sometimes her messages are beautiful and clear,
Yet others are dark and mysterious.
She breathes a peaceful air that removes all shreds of fear;
However, she can also make me quite hysterias.
The best part is that I have known her for most of my life.
In fact, she has been their in some of my earliest memories.
If I could, I would ask her to be my wife,
But that would contradict practically all logical decrees.
Regardless of that, I still enjoy to our dates near the bookshelf at home,
For she is my one true love, a poem.


A Silly Little Limerick
There was an old cow with the flu
Who was met by his best friend the ewe
His friend gave him a letter
Wishing him to get better
And with great delight he mooed


A Couple of Haikus Can be Pointless but Interesting

A dog is a dog
A dog is always a dog
Unless it's a cat

A cat say meow
A cat will never say bark
Or it is a dog

We know what they say
We know all of them but one
What does the fox say

Excuse the bad meme
I probably should stop now
While I am ahead.




A rhyme on every line

There is a rhyme,
On every single line.
Rather than having a pattern as a sign.
It goes AAAAAAAA this time.
Which is a rather peculiar design.
But absolutely could be refined.
A poet might think this as a crime.
A scholar might find this asinine.
They might find it scarier than a book by R.L. Stein.
Maybe even more painful than walking on needles of pine.
If they read out loud, they might want to gargle with brine.
Which would definitely make them whine,
Hopefully, though, this poem finds to be less harmful and more benign.
Louder than the fattest swine.
Now I hope you find this poem to be rather fine.
Heck, maybe even put it in a shrine.
In a mine.
Where it is surrounded by lights that shine.
For this poem may as well be divine.
Now it is possible that more people will read this than there is traffic on the Rhine.
There might even be some reading this in a vine.
And before I fully resign.
I should let you know that, before writing this, I did not drink any wine.
Yet with these sentences which are more than nine.
Where only some truly entwine.
Which all combine.
We have our poem that has a rhyme.
On every single line.


A note from your friend in A cross poem

Do you enjoy poems?
A little birdie may have told me, but I wasn't paying attention.
Very much so, I don't know your opinion on them.
Enjoyment can be a hit or miss at times.

Understand though, I'm no good at art or writing music, and I can never finish a story.
Nevertheless, poetry has been a passion for a while.
Knowing this, I hope you enjoyed just at least a tad bit of this.
Not getting what you want can be a bummer, but that can be a risk with things like this.
Over the top can be my style at times
With little jokes to over the top (sometimes rude) ideas.
Now lets face it, not everyone can have an amazing artist as their gifter.

Doing that would be unfair to the artist.
Except if everyone would give something to him/her.
These might sound like excuses, but I truly hope you enjoyment.
Especially with completely random haikus and a poem with a rhyme on every line.
Can you see where I am going with this?
In all honesty, I had a fun time writing these, and I hop you feel the hard work.
Value is in the eyes of the beholder though.
Enjoy the fun of trying to figure out who was your friend and who's where others!


Sincerely, your Invisible friend.
Spoiler : gotMLK7 :
Your IF wrote:"Hey there, how's it hangin'? Hope you like these sprites based off of what I could gather from your designs. (Ken is kinda iffy since I didn't see your design for him, but whatever yo!) I even made sure they all had glasses."
Image Image Image
Spoiler : hershel_layton :
Unfortunately, your Invisible Friend has been somewhat inactive forthe last couple months, and didn't submit their present in time :gumshoe: However, this happens every year, and usually they all get something from another user :3 I'm really sorry about this ;__;

Flash edit before posting the thread:
Zomg the miracles!
Your IF wrote:Yo, Hersh.

Sorry for the really small and awful gift. As the filename would suggest, if it's shown anywhere, I had more planned, but this is all that I finished before leaving to go on seemingly permanent hiatus. The other stuff wasn't really going to be much, still, but it is what it is. I feel really bad for only being able to hand in this one image, but deadlines are deadlines and I was only reminded of this, like, 5 minutes before writing this. So I uploaded what I had and that's it.

If you think there's any way at all I could make up my lack of gift to you, anything at all, contact me over Skype. Pretty sure I still have you added. Honestly, I do feel pretty guilty about this and would definitely want to give you more. Anything you want, name it and I'll try to make it so.

Again, deepest apologies.

Topaz
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Spoiler : DWaM :
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Your present!

Sorry, I do have to say something about this one... "xD"
Spoiler : kwando1313 :
Image Image Image Image
Spoiler : energizerspark :
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Image Image
Spoiler : Trybien :
Avatar:

Image Image Image Image

Signature:

Image
Spoiler : Tap :
Image

Image
Spoiler : Holhol :
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Spoiler : Topaz :
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Spoiler : Gumpei :
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Spoiler : Singidava :
Lain Iwakura

School Uniform
Image Image

Bear Costume/ Pajamas
Image Image

Random big version I made which was shrunken and used to make the sprites
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Spoiler : ShadowEdgeworth :
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============================================================
And that's it! This ends the list of presents of the Invisible Friend 2013 Edition! I hope you all had fun making those presents and opening them! (And with that I mean opening the spoiler tags. Er, not that the spoiler tags were your presents. Which they were. Gee that is sad.) Anyway, on a sadder (happier?) note, I will not be hosting any IF from now on, since they imply way too much work and they are quite time-consuming for me, considering I have university and all. Yay life.

With that said, the next host of the Invisible Friend will be Tap, since he is a moderator and thus has as much control as me over thread opening/closing/stickying (something that really comes in handy when it comes to Invisible Friend) and offered himself to do so earlier. That doesn't mean I won't participate: I probably will, but as you can understand, that takes much less time than organizing it.

That also means Tap won't participate. HAHA! SEE WHAT IT FEELS LIKE NOW :twisted:

People excluded from the next Invisible Friend (Well I'm not hosting but whatever)
  • Miraculously no one? Wow wut? HOW?! THERE'S ALWAYS THAT GUY \_(·_·)_/
That's all folks!
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DWaM
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by DWaM »

*listens to gift*
...

APOLLO I NEED YOUR HELP

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I... I love it, but...
But I...
I don't...
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SwagmaWampyr
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by SwagmaWampyr »

OMG MY GIFT IT'S GLORIOUS

ty so much whoever did that :D :D :D
The one and only Rated B member.
Engaged to Gumpei <3
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Tap
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Tap »

Everyone submitted their presents...? Run for the hills! It's the end of the world! :XD:

Present quality is amazing this year. A massive thank you to whoever made my gift! The perfect gift when Lightning Returns is around the corner...! :)
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Mono
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Mono »

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHhh
BEAUTIFUL ;A;
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Gav
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Gav »

That was... Interesting. Feel free to examine my present to my IF, and the present I opened.

Of course, my IF has committed an incredibly horrible sin. It's either a social commentary on my trials or an honest confession. Considering both...

Betting it's Zeta.
gotMLK7 wrote:This is a list where NBA Jam beats Mega Man 2.

ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE.
Gumpei
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Gumpei »

SOMEBODY did some research...! Or had previously been around me for at least 45 seconds. One of those things. Anyway, it's awesome. Much thanks!
Trybien
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Trybien »

Checks present... Off to change avatar and siggy! Thanks friend who is apparently invisible!
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Winner of the “Broken Commandments” Case Competition
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Topaz
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Topaz »

I feel pretty bad about receiving such a good drawing as my present, considering mine is only a bit of what I originally intended it to be.

But much thanks anyhow, whoever you are. I should be able to guess, but I've forgotten everyone's art styles.
Image
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energizerspark
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by energizerspark »

Ooh, I like my present! Thanks, whoever made it!
this signature has been left as it was when I left the forum for archival purposes
Currently watching:
Steven Universe
Currently playing:
Currently reading:
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the avatar is from Urusei Yatsura in case you were wondering
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Master Of Chaos
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Master Of Chaos »

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AT LONG LAST

IT IS FINALLY HERE!
Writer. Roleplayer. Fighting Game Enthusiast. Professional Scumbag/Troll.
Twitter/Ask.fm/Dustloop/Tumblr
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ShadowEdgeworth is my partner in crime. GuardianDreamer-san is my bestest buddy ever just ignore that conveniently hidden knife. Ami is the ultimate and most cuddly Senpai. And Patchu is my wife. I HAVE LEGAL PROOF!

Enjoy my short stories and other things relating to my roleplaying characters! (Link coming soon!)
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SwagmaWampyr
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by SwagmaWampyr »

...you werent even in it :P
The one and only Rated B member.
Engaged to Gumpei <3
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kwando1313
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by kwando1313 »

Vita-chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan <3 <3 <3

Thanks for the gift, whoever made it~
Avatar made by Rimuu~

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"The Knight of the Iron Hammer, Vita, and the Steel Count, Graf Eisen. There's nothing in this world we can't destroy."
Phantom

Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Phantom »

WOW, the production values are high in some of the graphics works. Nice job on those
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Wolf Speaker
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Re: The Invisible Friend '13 [PRESENTS]

Post by Wolf Speaker »

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO WHY DOES IT END THERE? I need to see if my Fury-and-I-are-secretly-lovers theory is riiiiiight! ;____;

jk, jk. Okay not really but thank you, IF. <3 I love it. In fact, I love it so much that it may well spawn.... FANART.
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Shuìlián - Lv.9
Adaptability

- Helping Hand
- Growl
- Tackle
- Tail Whip
- Sand-Attack
- Baby-Doll Eyes

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Mr. Darcy - Lv.8
Pick Up

- Odor Sleuth
- Tackle
- Growl
- Defense Curl
- Flail

Allistair - Lv.9
- Tackle
- Dragon Rage
- Focus Energy
- Bite
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