Contradictions in the Law

[drvonkitty]

Best of luck, TimeAxis.

Today’s the day! Currently we’ve received two entries: from TheDeadMan and from Khepri. Remember to submit yours via PM to me and Zekrom by 11:59 PM EST today. Let me know ASAP if there’s any issues.

[Super legenda]

Well, I just submitted my entry, good luck everyone.

[applekitty]

Super excited for the entries... Good luck to everyone, and hopefully I'll be able to liveblog all of them before I vote.

[TimeAxis]

Got the entry submitted. Also, my understanding is that it's not a vote, only the judges will be playing through them, right? (Although I plan to release mine publicly later after touching it up more, as I had to rush it out a bit for the contest)

[risefromtheashes]

Excited to see the entries and results!

[Bannedfrom7]

Submitted! Good luck to- oh wait link!

…Done! Good luck to everyone!

[drvonkitty]

And with that, all entries have been submitted! You still have just over an hour to make any final touch-ups, but remember that after 11:59 PM EST (~1 hour from now), you may not edit your entry until we've chosen a winner.

Also, no last minute dropouts is kind of awesome!! We received five entries total:
Turnabout On A Roulette by TheDeadMan
Semiramis Turnabout: Sleeping Dogs by Khepri
Turnabout of the Fallen by Super legenda
The Poisonous Turnabout by TimeAxis and Awsome2464
The Phantom's Turnabout by Bannedfrom7 and clcman

Looking forward to playing all of these, thanks everyone!! I'll post my reviews as I play through them—I should have some time to start on Saturday morning.

Edit: Oops, just read the above, but TimeAxis is correct, there's no vote. The winner will be based on me and Zekrom's decision, after which point it'll be up to the entrants to showcase immediately or wait. The winning entry could remain private for... well, a very long time (speaking from experience lmao)

[clcman]

Good luck to everyone!

I shall note for the record that The Phantom's Turnabout is almost entirely Bannedfrom7's work. I helped with ideas and did some copyediting at the end.

[Awsome2464]

The winning entry could remain private for... well, a very long time (speaking from experience lmao)

*looks at my trial manager* Ha. Hah hah...

[risefromtheashes]

The winning entry could remain private for... well, a very long time (speaking from experience lmao)

*looks at my trial manager* Ha. Hah hah...

*stares at Turnabout Heartache* Ha! Hah hah!

[Super legenda]

The winning entry could remain private for... well, a very long time (speaking from experience lmao)

*looks at my trial manager* Ha. Hah hah...

*stares at Turnabout Heartache* Ha! Hah hah!

Glares at Turnabout Perfection and Medium Attorney. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAH!

[clcman]

Fools, I have a winning entry from TEN YEARS AGO that's still private. Mostly.

[drvonkitty]

Turnabout on a Roulette by TheDeadMan


Today's judicial system? Wack!

Spoiler : Synopsis :

Francis Nest is accused of murdering his dentist at a house party. His mentor and attorney, Kristoph Gavin, is forced to withdraw as his attorney, so Francis has no choice but to defend himself. Despite knowing his innocence & what really happened, he has to figure out how to prove it at trial.

Spoiler : The Contradiction :

Defendants may know the exact truth of what happened, but if they have no evidence, no one will believe them.

Spoiler : Review :

Story: As AA cases go, this is a pretty typical "first case," and it doesn't do too much to depart from that formula. I was intrigued throughout, and curious to see where it would go, but to be perfectly honest, I was dissatisfied with the way it ended. I just felt like the conclusion came out of nowhere.

Characters: A mix of a couple OCs and some returning faces, though nothing spectacular. Our new characters are neat, but fairly one-dimensional, and limited by the fact that this is your standard AA first case with little time to spend. The canon characters are fine, though I wish they had some more time to shine, and a couple feel particularly underutilized.

Presentation: Pretty standard. No fades, a few missing timers, no courtroom minis, but understandable that you can't always have those things. No glaring errors, which is good!

Gameplay: Typical AA gameplay. Some shoddy case logic, but you have a general sense of the ebbs and flows of an AA mystery, which is good. A couple of particularly frustrating/confusing moments (the presentation of "???" and the presentation you marked as "obvious" in the walkthrough) stand out as major issues, but I won't elaborate on those here.

Theme Relevance: The legal contradiction here is that defendants may know that they are innocent, but despite that fact, be unable to prove that because they have no evidence. This is interesting, but I think what you have here is less a contradiction than the law than it is a reality of being social creatures—we are all individuals with individual experiences and individual perceptions of the world. Absent physical evidence, the only way to convince another that our version of events is the truth is to tell them. If they disagree, well... that's why we have the term "he said, she said." That's an issue that underlies many, many of our social institutions, including the law. That doesn't mean it's impossible to explore how it affects the law, but right now, I don't think you go into enough depth to really inquire about what kind of contradictions this causes within the legal system. I have some specific thoughts on how you could improve, but I won't share those here.

Overall: I would say this suffers from "first AAO case syndrome." What I mean by that is, you avoid many of the common pitfalls of first-time authors (which I believe you are, correct me if I'm wrong) who often create poorly-written & unplayable cases. Your case is neither of those things! It is, in fact, both well-written and playable! You use good grammar, you have a general sense of the ebbs and flow of an AA trial, and there's a clear thread throughout with a typical mystery we expect from an AA game. Plenty of first-time authors fail at these basics, so major commendations to you for succeeding at doing so—I really mean that! That being said, you do fall into some of the more subtle, yet important, traps that plague trial authors. The mystery isn't particularly well-developed, with some spotty case logic; the characters lack much depth, especially OCs; and in the scope of the case competition, the theme is lacking. While that sounds negative, please don't get me wrong: I still think you did a good job! This was impressive & an enjoyable little game, and I think you have plenty of promise as a trial author. I hope you'll keep pursuing this project, as it seems to be the first case of a series.

If you're interested (and this goes for all entrants!), I can send a full review via PM that's more along the lines of a playtest/QA that goes in-depth with spoilers/suggestions/improvements. Totally optional, but the offer is there.

Next up is The Poisonous Turnabout by TimeAxis and Awsome2464!

[TheDeadMan]

Well, I'm just glad that it wasn't completely terrible. Hopefully, next time or some time in the future, I'll meet up to your expectations.

[drvonkitty]

Well, I'm just glad that it wasn't completely terrible. Hopefully, next time or some time in the future, I'll meet up to your expectations.

Please don't take my review the wrong way! It's not about "meeting up to my expectations"—it's more about giving my honest review of the case. That doesn't mean it was bad or that it failed to meet my expectations by any means. Unfortunately, it's hard to convey much in the way of constructive criticism in this public review, since the standard formula is to give a short review that avoids any spoilers due to the fact that the entries aren't publicly released. I'd happily give you my full review (with many constructive critiques!) via PM.