RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by Ami »

Mote Town, Egypt

A small town in Egypt, recently occupied and renamed by England, with no more than 150 citizens. There were, however, about 50 soldiers occupying the area on top of that. The town itself wasn't very important, what was important was its strategic placement on a supply route to Cairo, where the majority of forces were.

The mission was to infiltrate and sabotage, but Ami knew that a group of fifty was too few to slip into with one of her "acquired" many uniforms unnoticed, or to take any of their places without being spotted immediately. However, she could slip into the small community itself without being noticed, as the majority were of Japanese descent like her. She was willing to bet that the occupying force wouldn't notice, and that at least someone amongst the population would believe she was the cousin of someone for a few days. Of course, this would mean that the hotels were out of the question, so currently she was "cousin Ima" from their kid whoever's birthplace in Japan to an elderly couple who probably had also figured out she wasn't who she purported to be, but either didn't care or supported what she was doing.

Having just arrived, Ami didn't know the town yet. She did, however, have plenty of opportunity to find out. The problem became if should arm herself, and if so, with what? She pondered this while giving routine maintenance to Victoria, wiping the various parts down with a rag drenched in gun oil.
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by Gombarry »

"How long till we reach the base?" Asked Luke, He was getting impatient. The recent struggle had left him a bit stressed and his usual vents wernt available. He just wanted Saburo conscious again, so he could further the American interest in the war. As was his mission. But sometimes, the American interest dragged a bit.
"We should be there in about 20 mins, Luke" said the pilot " we have to take things a tad slower if we don't want to be detected by the Chinese rebels."
Luke sighed, he turned around and left the cockpit. Left wondering what to do. He couldn't draw to express himself, didn't feel like talking to himself in public. And there wasn't enough room for practice with the katana. What to do what to do! However, after pacing a bit he found Sams room. Contemplating for a bit, he decided to give it a try. He turned the latch, and peeked into the room.
"Hello?"
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Okay, this looks rather recent....can I join? sign up info in spoiler
Spoiler : :
Username: Mr.Awesome
Name: Thomas
Age: around 15
Gender: Male
Allied Nation: United States
Occupation: Foot solider or whatever position has him in the fray
Appearance: A bit scrawny, with a freshly shaved beard, and a weird anime-like hairstyle. Sports rectangle glasses
Backstory: Just joined the force and is a bit of a rookie when it comes to war
Weapons: A semi-automatic pistol and a dagger
Skills and Knowledge: Has some skills in martial arts, and knows a thing or two about hacking.
OPTIONAL:
Personality: A bit withdrawn, but get the job done, also like making humorous remarks to lighten the mood.
Quotes: We gotta stay strong if we're going to do this!
Other: Has a nervous breakdown when he talks to girls
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by gotMLK7 »

Spoiler : :
Well, let's see...I don't think I can accept this app JUST yet.
First, a last name might make the character a bit more...identifiable. xP Just a suggestion, though.
Second, backstory needs some major work. Backstory should go into details of the character's origins and what brought them into this war. Just being new to the war doesn't give much information about his character. Try going into a lot more details. This RP is just as character-driven as it is action-driven, so it's important to give characters some depth. Perhaps read through the OP and other character apps again and look for facts that may factor into your character's past (for example, Samantha Clark's backstory mentions a US program for young soldiers coming into war, which would be a good way to bring a 15-year-old in if he had a good reason to join).
Three, a little more details about his skills would be nice. To what extent is he skilled in martial arts, and how good is he at hacking? These are important things to clarify just in case any issues with them come into play down thel ine (he might get into a fight with someone, but it'd be difficult to judge what he is capable of).
And this is more optional, but an outfit description and perhaps a hair color might make it easier to describe him in the point of view of other characters who are just meeting him.

The character itself seems fine, just go into some mroe epth in the app to give us a better idea of what he's like and I can accept him. Quality characters make all the difference in RPs here on AAO. ;D Not trying to be mean or anything, just giving some friendly advice so you can adapt more to the slightly more to the style of RPing here.
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Spoiler : :
It's fine, Here is a small revision:
Username: Mr.Awesome
Name: Thomas Bluemann
Age: around 15
Gender: Male
Allied Nation: United States
Occupation: Foot solider or whatever position has him in the fray
Appearance: A bit scrawny, with a freshly shaved beard, and has brown hair with a weird anime-like hairstyle. Sports rectangle glasses. As for what else he wears....possibly one of those army suits, and a locket around his neck with a picture of his family
Backstory: Just an ordinary teenager until the war came around, since then, the suffering of the family (They all need food and water, but his younger sister is starving, his parents are sick, his aunt already died, his uncle is dying, and his older brother is the only one capable of making the long trip for the very limited food, water and medicine) eventually drives him to enter the war and help end it. Seeing a opportunity with a new US program for young soldiers coming into war, he takes it. Before he leaves, his mother gives him a locket to keep with him at all times, to remember what he's fighting for.
Weapons: A semi-automatic pistol and a dagger
Skills and Knowledge: Has a red belt in martial arts, and is excellent at hacking some lower tech devices.
OPTIONAL:
Personality: A bit withdrawn, but get the job done, also like making humorous remarks to lighten the mood.
Quotes: We gotta stay strong if we're going to do this!
Other: Has a nervous breakdown when he talks to girls
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by gotMLK7 »

Spoiler : :
...Seems to check out, albeit still rather simple. Accepted.

Make sure you read through this thread first to get a good idea of where characters are and what writing in this RP is like style-wise before making your intro post.
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Spoiler : :
Okay, I'll do that
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Alright, now that I'm up to speed, I'll just stick his intro into a spoiler (to save space obviously)
Spoiler : :
Washington DC, Pennsylvania
"S-sir?"
"Yes?"
"We have another wave of young troops ready sir to meet the commander-in-chief"
"Excellent. Bring them in.
One by one they are brought in. One boy was wearing a white coat, of the intel sector. The president shook his hand and saluted him, then came a bulky lad with a green coat, of the soldier sector. He shook his hand and saluted him in the same manner. After that came a girl in a brown coat, of the pilot sector. He gave her the same introduction as the first 2. Finally, it seemed that was everyone.
"Is that all of them?"
"There is one more sir"
"Go find him"
Shortly, they had found him
"Where was he?"
"He was wandering around, says he got lost sir"
"Well, never mind that, he's here now"
In front of him stood a scrawny kid, about his height, who looked 17, wearing a green coat, which meant he came from the soldier sector. Underneath his jacket he had just ordinary looking clothes, a little too casual considering where he just came from. His hair was also very messy, looking like it hadn't been combed in days. He was also wearing a gold locket around his neck and rectangle glasses that made look like a geek. At one side was a semi-automatic pistol and on the other was a dagger. He was looking at him quite nervously.
"What's you age son?"
"15 s-sir"
He couldn't believe it. Here stood a child, 15 years old, almost looking down on him.
"Your name?"
"T-that would be Thomas Bluemann, sir"
"You know what your fighting for?"
Then, all the sudden, the kid gave him a straight face, not showing any nervousness.
"I'm fighting for the ones I hold dear, sir"
"And who would that be?"
"My younger sister, parents, Uncle, and older brother, sir"
"Okay, stop calling me 'sir' after every statement Mr. Bluemann"
"Can do, I g-guess"
"Why the nervousness?"
"Well, i-it's just that I'm not sure how long I'll last out there s- heh, almost said it"
"Well, from your light weaponry, it looks like you should be an assassin.
"No sir, I've been told you have enough of those as it is"
"Alright then."
They shake hands and salute, although Thomas does it incorrectly.
Then he stood in front of the 4.
"Now, it's time to give you 4 missions..."
The pilot would help send troops into china.
The bulky soldier would be staying in america, along with the intel agent.
"As for you Mr. Bluemann, you'll be headed off to Tokyo, Japan"
"The place where they make videogames?"
"Yes..."
"Cool beans"
"I'm having you meet up with an assassin I sent there not to long ago"
"Which one? The mature one, or the one who looks like a Japanese school girl?"
"The latter..."
"Erm...alright..."
"Something wrong?"
"I-it's nothing, off to Tokyo I go!"
I apologize if I went against any guidelines
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by gotMLK7 »

Spoiler : :
....Okay uh...Several problems ith this post...
One, it breaks the rule of "No controlling the world leaders" clearly stated in the OP. Speaking as the President is in direct violation of the rules of the RP, which makes this post unfortunately null and void immediately.
Two, spoiler-tags are used for out of character parts, no matter how long a post is, and you got the two backwards.
Three, a lot of this post seems to pull from Sam Clark's first post, almost copying parts of it at times.
Four, Sam was actually sent to Beijing, China to assassinate Hou Chao, not Tokyo, Japan.
Five, there's no reason given or seen why afoot soldier should be sent to check on an assassin during a mission as crucial as killing a former world leader.

I'm sorry, but this post can't be accepted as canon as it stands, and has to be considered invalidated. I'm not trying to sound like a jerk or an elitist right now, trust me, but this post just doesn't work out with the RP for multiple reasons. Make sure you reread the rules and check out GuardianDreamer's Guide to Roleplaying in the stickied topics before re-posting. Again, I'm not trying to come off as mean or angry, but you need to make sure that your post works well withotut violating any rules. ^^'
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Well, alright. How about I redo it, skipping to the part where he gets to Tokyo, ignoring the part about the assassin?
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Please read the spoiler before continuing.
Spoiler : :
So background for this introduction: Thomas Bluemann and a few other soldiers are on their way to Tokyo, Japan for Washington D.C, also I will note I'm a little vague on details about outside events because I don't want to risk it with the guidelines again. Also, for when my character is thinking I have it "typed like this" I also have sound effects *like this*
Somewhere over Germany/Italy
A plane is flying over the thin border between Germany and Italy. In it, a dozen soldiers and a pilot. Thomas Bluemann is in deep though. "Man, it seems like we've been flying for hours! The suspense is killing me!"
"Hey man, you alright?"
He brings his head to see a guy sitting next to him. He had blonde hair, a decent build, and even a beard.
"Yeah, I'm fine, just have a lot of stress, you know?"
"I hear ya man, don't worry, we'll get there"
"He's right, we're passing over Germany now, shouldn't be too long"
That was the pilot: a red head, with pale skin and freckles. Time passes, then all the sudden:
*BOOM!*
"What happened?!?" shouted the African American kid.
"We've been hit! We're going down!"
It wasn't even 15 seconds later when the plane crashed into a lush forest. Thomas Bluemann passes out on impact. When he awakes, he finds himself 5 feet from the plane.
"How'd I get here?....Oh, now it's coming to me, we crash-landed, explains why I'm over here."
He looks around.
"Question is, where am I exactly?"
He ponders for a bit when he realizes something:
"Oh no! The others!"
He pulls away some rubble to see them all dead, one even skewered by the bent-up metal of the plane. He kneels down, in tears.
"Why?, God all Mighty, Why?..."
He realizes what he must do. He scavenges for some supplies. He manages to find a semi-automatic pistol and a dagger. He also finds a small survival kit. The shock of the event fades away and he starts feeling pain. He had only suffered a few bruises and a cut on his left hand. He wraps it up.
"There should be a town around here, if I'm lucky, I'll run into one of my own"
He looks at the dagger he picked up.
"Although that's not very likely considering I'm in enemy territory. I'll have to do my best in order to stay alive."
He picks up the survival kit, straps it around him, and trudges off into the wilderness.
Spoiler : :
What I'm planning his, He'll eventually find his way to Tokyo, but not before making his way though the hostile terrain.
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by Ami »

An idea crossed Ami's mind on how to make a solution to the whole "disrupt the supply point" problem. But this one would take savvy, cunning, but mostly misdirection.

* * *

Well, as much misdirection as one can now make in the midst of a fire-fight. This was clearly not working how she had planned it. "In retrospect," Ami thought aloud, "trying to pull the old 'lit-sheet in the gas tank' bit without taking care of any spotlights and guards first was a bad idea." She had taken cover behind the tollbooth, away from the warehouse that faced the road. Which was fortunate, given that everyone knew she was there now. Unfortunately, there is no more cover, unless the two guys she took out that actually occupied the tollbooth could count as "cover".

Speaking of cover, there is an open bullet wound from a rooftop-guard currently haphazardly wrapped in a ripped-off sleeve from one of the dead officers at the tollbooth. It hadn't hit any major arteries, but a bullet to the thigh generally tends to inhibit one's ability to flee, or do much of anything. However, there was one thought at the back of Ami's mind. Something along the lines of "Wait, if I ran here for cover, where was that jeep I tried to blow up?", and "I really should've brought more than Mr. and Mrs. Goodnight.", but mostly the first thought. That's when both thoughts were put to rest. Chiefly, the former again. It was about this time that a huge explosion had taken out the side of the wall said jeep was next to.

"... Huh, that's lucky." Indeed it was. Of course, even luckier, the warehouse was full of munitions that led to several tinier explosions which would start several fires around the area. Unluckily, these fires were quickly spreading to the rest of the town that had graciously given her shelter. What passed for the fire fighters in town attempted to quell the flames with a few of the strategically placed hydrants around town. The few soldiers that survived this blaze in the barracks next door quickly went to their remaining vehicles and quickly drove away.

"Now... time to go get some well-deserved rest." Ami declared, using a nearby chair as a crutch.

* * *

Except Ami would find no rest. Outside the house she was staying in were her belongings inside of her usual trunk and suitcase. The owners did not look pleased. After some rather direct discussion and cursing, it turns out they are contacts for Ami's boss. Who apparently define "sabotage" as "not lying in ruins and throwing the entire town into a frenzy". It would be now that Ami could use her silver tongue to calmly explain the situation.

"Oh... um... oops?" Now was not one of those times. From the sound of things, today would not be a day to get a paycheck. The elderly couple would direct her to a vehicle to transport the mercenary to a nearby town with a hospital, which would probably cost most of her paycheck. A paycheck which would inevitably be diminished for "poor conduct", "reckless actions", "not thinking things logically through", and "not listening to your superiors". Rolling her eyes, Ami limped towards the elderly couple's car, no doubt having to listen about how "in real life, para-military operations need to be well-thought out and executed to prevent civilian backlash, excessive damages, and civilian casualties".

Tonight would be a very long night for Ami, the normally-competent mercenary.



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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Spoiler : :
Man, I couldn't find a single person who is currently in Germany or Italy. I guess my character is kind of disconnected from everyone else until something big happens.
Thomas Bluemann walked for what seemed like hours, then an all too familiar sound came across his ears:
*Grumble*
He hadn't eaten since he got onto the plane, and that took place around 9:00 that morning. He didn't see any wild animals running around, but he knew he had to soon or else he'd eventually die of starvation. He saw a tree next to him and got an idea.
"Maybe if I climb this tree, I can look for anything that might be food."
He was lucky his suit came with a small pair of binoculars. He started climbing, a branch he had grabbed onto snapped, and he fell a few feet.
*Bam!*
Now he had more bruises to take place of the ones that had just recently healed.
"Darn it, I grabbed a weak branch...one more time, then I'm using a different tree."
This time he climbed up with no problems. He brought the binoculars up to his eyes and began to look around. In the distance he saw a deer, primed for the picking.
"Alright! Food! Now, I just need to get closer, it's to far away for me pistol, and unlike those online FPS I used to play, there isn't any way to hack the code to make the pistol have game-breaking properties."
He carefully slid down the tree, and started to creep his way toward the unsuspecting deer. Inch by inch, until:
*snap!*
The deer was instantly alarmed and ran away.
"Darn it! Stepped on a branch. Let's try that again..."
We skip a little ahead in time to find himself sneaking up on another deer. This time he brings out his pistol, and takes aim. The gun fires:
*BANG!*
The deer drops down dead.
"Sorry about that, but I need some calories to keep going"
He cuts up the deer with his dagger. We skip until after his meal. He gulps down a little water from the canteen in his survival kit and stuffs the canteen back in it.
"Great, now I should be able to survive another day or two out here, but that doesn't mean I can't stop trying to find civilization."
He stands up.
"Well, off I go!"
Spoiler : :
At this point, I have no idea where he should end up, but until then, I'm posting his misadventures in the wilderness.
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by gotMLK7 »

Spoiler : :
...Sorry I really have to point something out that's preeeeetty important.
You say he's on the border between Germany and ITaly...but that doesn't exist. :T Swizerland, Lichtenstein, and Austria all lie between Germany and Italy's borders. So uh...your character is kinda in a non-existant area. :T
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Re: RP: Final Warfare: Tides of War (Part 2 Sign-ups)

Post by MrAwesome »

Spoiler : :
Well, I was told that Italy and Germany were right on top of each-other. So let's say I was referring to Austria, and I'll keep it in mind in later posts
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