The Countdown Thread

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CardiaX
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The Countdown Thread

Post by CardiaX »

This is a thread where we can post our own countdowns, and talk about other CDers such as the Autarch of Flame or Fiery Joker. To start, I'll just copy and paste the Autarch of Flame's top ten cliches list.

10: Random Final Bosses (Final Fantasy 9)
Reason: I love final boss battles and especially the buildup to some of these battles. But of course, not every finale is like that. Oh no, then we have THOSE final bosses. You know, the bosses that just come out of nowhere and leave you wondering whether it's actually the final boss? These battles are completely anti-climax and always ruin the emotional intensity of the game you're playing. Likely the most infamous example of this is Necron from Final Fantasy 9, a boss that appears at the last minute, has an ambiguous backstory, and wholly unoriginal. Not only does this guy have GLARING similarities to Exdeath, but he also directly rips off dialogue from YODA!!! That's just shameful! When the final boss is something we haven't been anticipating like Necron, the fight comes across as not just rushed, but a complete let-down.
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9: Ability Loss (Metroid Prime)
Reason: Remember Castlevania: Symphony of the Night? Yeah, we're starting strong, we're killing enemies and-- Wait... what...? Oh, (sensored) you! Now I have to get all of my items back! Situations when you lose all of your powers annoy me. Especially when you get used to some of the abilities given to you at the start. When you suddenly lose them, it really throws you off by how weak you've become and how enemies you could have easily overcome earlier become much harder to kill. Sometimes the situation in which you lose your abilities is completely ridiculous. In Metroid Prime, you lose your abilities AFTER JUST GETTING THROWN AGAINST A WALL!
FAIL
This cliche is undeniably terrible. But it isn't TOO bad if you get new abilities you didn't have earlier to compensate.
*Metroid victory fanfare plays*
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8: Obvious Weak Spots (Super Mario Galaxy)
Reason: To me, half the fun of boss battles is discovering HOW you beat them. Unfortunately, that doesn't seem to be what some developers had in mind. ESPECIALLY in Nintendo games. Boss battles keep displaying obvious weak spots. The Super Mario Galaxy series is practically synonymous with this practice. Bowser Jr. outright TELLS you what the weakness of Gobblegut is, despite how blatantly obvious his weak points are discovered! And then there are just some bosses that--
*looks at Sorbetti*
OH, WHAT IN THE WORLD!? Am I seeing this right? This boss's weak spot couldn't be more obvious even if it were flashing, had arrows pointing to it, and a giant banner on the weak spot saying "HIT ME"! This is also common in adventure games like the Legend of Zelda series, where in almost every dungeon, the main boss is killed in some way by the main weapon that is found in there. That's just as bad because it's like that in almost every game in the series! This combined with the apparent need to tell you the weak spot is just INSULTING people's intelligence! Try something new for once, Nintendo!
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7: Backtracking (Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door)
Reason: Fetch quests are where you travel around the entire world either looking for certain items, certain people, or trading items. These situations CAN be boring, but if it's accomplished as the game flows on, fetch quests are actually pretty enjoyable. There are some instances in games however, where you travel back and forth between certain areas MULTIPLE TIMES, seeing the same things over and over again, and all the while likely being forced to travel by foot. The game to me that is synonymous with such awful backtracking moments is Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door. In nearly every chapter, there is some form of repetitive situations, whether this means travelling between Twilight Town and Creepy Steeple and always fighting the same respawning enemies, searching for General White in the most boring fetch quest OF ALL TIME, and worst of all, going all the way through a jungle and back TO GET A WEDDING RING!!! Yeah. Because you would TOTALLY think the godfather would be playing a Mario game. Personally, in terms of backtracking, I think I'll stick with the N64 Paper Mario.
"HEY!!! I'M GETTING OLD HERE!!!"
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6: Bottomless Pits and Spikes (Super Mario Bros./ Mega Man 2)
Reason: This... is a tie between the two most overused obstacles in gaming history. Bottomless pits and spikes! Both of these obstacles have been around since FOREVER. We've seen bottomless pits ever since Super Mario Bros., and spikes gained a ton of popularity with the rise of the Mega Man series. But since then, both of these obstacles have spread like cancer to almost every other video game series EVER. Half of their appearances in games don't make a lot of sense. I mean, where do all the bottomless pits lead to in the Mushroom Kingdom? To the underground? Well, that can't be right, I mean a few stages are underground! So does the underground only let people survive when it feels like it? The Mega Man series uses the bottomless pits and spiked cliches to death in every game in the series. Especially in Dr. Wily's fortresses. In the first Mega Man, there are so many spikes in Wily's fortress, it makes you wonder how Wily gets around his fortress each day without getting gored by his own death traps! Cave Story also features spiked plants that mostly kill you in one hit. What purpose does that serve other than making a repetitive and frustrating game even more repetitive and frustrating!? Why are there plants growing underground anyway!? Why does Cave Story hate me so much!? AND WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP USING THESE GENERIC OBSTACLES!?!?
"HEHEHEHE!"
SHUT UP!!!
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5: Setting up Sequels (Mega Man 4)
Reason: Whenever I see someone make an ending to a game that signals an OBVIOUS sequel, I feel a little of my faith in humanity die inside. If you're going to make an ending to a video game that indicates a sequel, at least have some dignity and make it entertaining! You know, because video games are entertaining! Arguably, the most infamous example is the ending of Halo 2, where Master Chief says he is going to "finish the fight" only to have Halo 2 end right after he says this! But in my opinion, the absolute WORST ending of this kind comes from Mega Man 4, where Dr. Wily escapes his fortress through by getting out through a secret door! Yeah. That pretty much says: "Thanks for playing! Get ready to fork over your twenties for Mega Man 5 in a few months!"
GAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!
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4: Brooding over the Past (Metroid: Other M)
Reason: Let's face it. A dark past is always necessary for character development, especially heroes. BUT DO THEY ALWAYS HAVE TO BROOD OVER IT!? Characters that have a dark past will always take every given opportunity to monologue about every single depressing detail of their past! Especially with rise of voice acting. The worst part about this is that many characters with dark pasts don't seem to develop much. Cloud still keeps brooding on and on even after he defeats Sephiroth for the first time! Samus is emotionally scarred by Ridley, showing this in Metroid Prime 3, by attempting to violently finish him off, and literally freezing in fear after seeing the terrifying beast revived unexpectedly in Other M! And Shadow the Hedgehog has to have the most cliched of all backstories. The fact that he doesn't remember ANYTHING. Nobody's perfect. People still love these characters despite their flaws, but if a character broods on for the WHOLE game, it gets very annoying because it seems that brooding is all that these characters can do!
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3: Faked Deaths (Final Fantasy 4)
Reason: Cutscene deaths are annoying. But at least they're... well, deaths... If you're going to go through all the drama of having a character enter a near inescapable scenario, at least respect common sense and have the character actually die! The undisputed king of faked deaths is Final Fantasy 4, where only one major character dies, even despite there being four other scenes where characters appear to die! All of the characters in questions, except for Tella, reappear very much alive after their supposed death scenes, and continue to fight another day! What's worse is that these survivors survive after the most impossible situations! An example of which is Yung, who is saved from an exploding room by fairies. But worst of all is Cid, an old man who survives detonating a grenade in order to block a rocky cavern to the underworld all the while falling from the sky!
"What do you know? Haven't you ever heard of suspension of disbelief!?"
Yeah, but I've also heard of completely ruining a dramatic moment! Hmm... That reminds me...
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2: Unoriginal Villains (Final Fantasy 5)
Reason: I've been ranting about unoriginal concepts throughout this whole lists. And now that we're in the top two, it's time to tackle one of the big ones: UNORIGINAL VILLAINS. You know what I'm talking about. Those unthreatening hacks that stand around, monologue constantly, always laugh, and somehow manage to do all of this while not getting killed mid-speech or mid-laughter! The absolute worst defender of this kind is Exdeath from Final Fantasy 5. Apart from having a backstory that might as well have been made from MADLIBS, nothing about this guy is subtle. All he does is boast, monologue, and laugh! I'm not exaggerating! Before the final battle with him, he literally does ALL THREE! I don't think I need to say anymore. This cliche speaks for itself.
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1 (Oh, no...): Underwater Levels (Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)
Reason: You hate them. I hate them. Everyone known to man hates them. You're asking what I'm talking about? The answer will likely convulse you with bad memory induced rage. Well, this is it. The worst cliche in gaming history is... the underwater levels. Oh, man! These levels are ALWAYS a total pain! The physics of the game are always altered in these sections, almost NEVER for the better. Widely considered the most frustrating level in Zelda history, Ocarina of Time's water temple perfectly exemplifies my hatred for underwater stages. The amount of times you will switch the water levels, put on your iron boots, as well as scream in agony is so mind-blowing, that Shigero Reomoto himself regrets the water temple's design! 2-D platformers are abominable with regards to their water levels. The Sonic series will have you literally DROWN if you stay underwater for too long, and controls are slippery underwater. Gravity is altered in the Mega Man series, coupled with spikes, the decreased gravity underwater WILL BE. THE. DEATH. OF. YOU. I wonder if the designers of these 2-D stages have ever been in water before. You do NOT sink in water. You FLOAT on top of the water!
"What do you know? Haven't you ever heard of--"
SHUT UP!!!
It only seems to make sense in the Metroid series, where Samus is in a heavy metal suit of armor, and even then, her movement is hindered! Honestly, these levels are unavoidable, but because of how shockingly patience trying these levels are, we almost NEVER enjoy their repeated appearances! These levels are practically always the ones that aggravate us the most. I think underwater levels are the WORST cliche of all time.

So have fun.
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TrialmanAKASoma Cruz
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Re: The Countdown Thread

Post by TrialmanAKASoma Cruz »

I love all generations of My Little Pony and I'm proud of it! Paste this into your sig if you are too!
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To please my Yuri side. (Picture by adcoon on DA)
♂ + ♂ = ♥
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Love should be genderless.
If you agree, please add this to your signature.
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CardiaX
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Re: The Countdown Thread

Post by CardiaX »

...I didn't realize that other thread was there.
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Meph
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Re: The Countdown Thread

Post by Meph »

In that case, I'll close this. :)

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