My Grammar

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DKJustice1
Posts: 174
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2012 1:44 pm
Gender: Female
Spoken languages: English

Re: My Grammar

Post by DKJustice1 »

* Legal double post as it still on topic*

My Grammar has improved: My use of punctuation- is getting better and it now seems fine. Check this out.

The rose red sky, seemed to be painted by the setting sun. Rose smiled as she stood in her garden which was full of poppies:
She thought to herself it is a lovely evening. However: the peace would soon be shattered like that of proverbial glass.
Last edited by DKJustice1 on Sun Apr 28, 2013 11:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
Ace Attorney Poem.

What a crime is done.
Gumshoe's has come.
His name is Dick.
It's a point and click.


To find a clue
or maybe a few.
To made your point of view.

In the trial
where every one stares
the judge does glare.


Objections fly from everywhere!
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energizerspark
Posts: 4130
Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 5:41 pm
Gender: Male
Spoken languages: English
Location: the Whole Sort of General Mish Mash

Re: My Grammar

Post by energizerspark »

DKJustice1 wrote:* Legal double post as it still on topic*

My Grammar has improved: My use of punctuation- is getting better and it now seems fine. Check this out.

The rose red sky, seemed to be painted by the setting sun. Rose smiled as she stood in her garden, which was full of poppies.
She thought to herself, "It is a lovely evening." However, the peace would soon be shattered, like proverbial glass.
Just did some helpful fixing.
this signature has been left as it was when I left the forum for archival purposes
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User avatar
DKJustice1
Posts: 174
Joined: Fri Jun 29, 2012 1:44 pm
Gender: Female
Spoken languages: English

Re: My Grammar

Post by DKJustice1 »

The sun was mottled through the canopy of the trees. A short burst of footstep faded into nothing as the bird song dies.
The last of the sun, disappears behind the tree's in a Rose glow; blackened clouds line up for inspection animals duck for cover as rain pelts the ground. Deep growl starts the sky and soon a flash as to that of a camera lights up the sky.

Under the trees huddles a young girl her mother laying flat out in front of her not moving, cold like ice, her skin is greyish white.
" Mummy I am scared...."
....................

" Mummy?"

.......

" MUMMY!"

The girls touches the ladies hand and draws back sinking she hugs herself unseen tears fall with the rain.

....

How about this?
Ace Attorney Poem.

What a crime is done.
Gumshoe's has come.
His name is Dick.
It's a point and click.


To find a clue
or maybe a few.
To made your point of view.

In the trial
where every one stares
the judge does glare.


Objections fly from everywhere!
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