Never Trust The Narrator

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DWaM
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DWaM »

*sniiiiiiiff*

Really how could you
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by kwando1313 »

wow DWaM, I am shocked that such an upright and moral standing person like yourself has used cocaine

i am shocked and horrified

next thing you'll let me know is you used it to make your trials crazier, or something
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by TheDoctor »

Enthalpy wrote:The rules are currently that editing (unless direly necessary) is off-limits until after the competition ends.
I know. I was mainly asking when the competition was going to end.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by Reecer6 »

kwando1313 wrote:wow DWaM, I am shocked that such an upright and moral standing person like yourself has used cocaine

i am shocked and horrified

next thing you'll let me know is you used it to make your trials crazier, or something
i thought we all made pretty clear

"don't you try it

don't try it"

;_;
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DeeYo »

The review for our last minute entrant's last minute entry, Everything's Alright, also known as Plan 9 From Outer Space 4 DS: Springtime for Enigma will follow.
Spoiler : Spoiler-Free Summary :
Everything's Alright is a really elaborate joke created to be as theme-relevant as possible and to bribe as many judges as possible. It will probably lose its charm once the competition fades away, so play it while you can. Or don't.
Spoiler : Spoilerous Summary :
Everything's Alright is a really elaborate joke created to be as theme-relevant as possible (~amnesiac protag killer) and to bribe as many judges as possible (Hungarian Sailor Moon and Apollo speaking German). Due to lack of time, a proper detailed version of the case will not follow.
Spoiler : VERY SPOILEROUS Review :
Everything's Alright is a high-quality ****post.

Story Concept:
"Do you have an interesting, engaging, innovative and logical story? Are the characters interesting?"
The story's nice - the logic seemed to hold up, even if there wasn't really anything in the plot to distinguish this from another AA trial (except for the zaniness). Defending your mentor from the smug prosec depicted by Edgeworth is nothing new, so let's focus on the twist.

The twist was the biggest 4th wall breaking a comp has ever seen, probably. It's a shame it's unfinished, since the charm in joke trials is how ridiculous they can get. And we haven't reached the peak yet.

The characters were amazing. Canon characters were characterized well - despite their being in a joke trial, they mainly kept the way they interact with each other (except for Fulbright, of course) and the new characters are also pretty solid. Especially Zero III.

I'd be willing to say "a game needs to start off slow so that the twist has more power", but there were entries in this comp where every minute brought a new twist, so...

Rating: 7oo bad

Story Execution:
"Is the story well-paced? Is the dialogue and narration well-written and natural-sounding?"
Regardless of what I said in the last category, the pacing was fine. No witness got too little or too much time, and about characters sounding natural... well, it's a comedy-ish trial. They surely didn't sound like people in a courtroom, but that's fine.


Rating: 8reat

Graphics & Music:
"Are the graphics and music well-done? Do they fit the characters, situations and atmosphere?"
The only asset that I remember enigma having made specifically for this entry is Bonzi Bunny, which is an instant +2 points from me because I found it amusing. Maybe also the Al Mayo sprites. Still, the Fulbright set had already been made. There are other entries where a whole lot of other assets were made, so even if this entry doesn't need that many graphics, I'll still deduct points as an incentive to others that did take their time making heckloads of assets for their entries.

Rating: 7ake this as you will

Technical Perfection:
"Has your trial been tested carefully, with few bugs, typos or grammar mistakes?"
fifth avenue (why lowercase?)
"Now, when you say Karma you don't mean..." apollo's still at the witness stand
"Being a hero of justice, I went over to check on the criminal when I noticed his trunk had popped open." 4-liner (not the only one)
Lamirior (Lamiroir)

The grammar's fine. An Aussie made it, after all. That's why I'll just use my biased judge powers and subtract more points for the typos.

Rating: 7ypos are bad, okay?

Gameplay:
"Is the gameplay fair, interesting and enjoyable? Are the puzzles designed and executed well?"
Out of all the entries, this one is actually the only one that asks something from you and changes the script accordingly. Sure, it's in the 4th-wall-breaking segments, but I assume quite some programming went into
"höhöhö
höhöhöhöhöhö
höhöhöhöhöhöhöhöhö"


At least that's what I chose as my laughter.
Puzzles and contradictions were also fair. In fact, I nominate the super-present "Best Super-Present of the Year". (Which really doesn't say anything since everyone stopped doing them ages ago, but it was amazing.)

Rating: 9rand

Theme Relevance:
"Is the theme relevant to your story? Is it interpreted in an interesting and innovative way?"
Well, the case is prolly the most relevant to the comp theme out of all the entries. Which, considering that it's a semi-joke trial, isn't that surprising. Still, relevance is relevance - protagonist being someone completely different definitely counts as an unreliable narrator.

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Phantasmagoria of Betrayal did it first, though

Rating: 10ok how relevant it was

Overall:
7 + 8 + 7 + 7 + 9 + 10 = 42 / 60 (7)

The entry was funny, it really was. It's still a joke, though, directed specifically at us and specifically at this comp theme. Here at Judge Co., we (I) believe that the comp theme should just be an incentive and that the final result should be something that stands on its own, without even knowing what the theme was or who the judges were.

As such, these scores won't objectively decide the winner. This entry is certainly the best in its own genre, but there were no others in this genre.
Spoiler : Scores, Spoiler-Free :
Overall:
7 + 8 + 7 + 7 + 9 + 10 = 42 / 60 (7)
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DeeYo »

Professor Layton and the Turnabout of the Golden Witch is the biggest judge-bribal in recent years that also stands up if you view it from an outside-of-the-competition trial. It honestly sounds like this crossover between three franchises has been random generated via some webpage, or taken from a fanfiction written by a 13-year-old. Clearly, the gruesome brutalities of the Umineko universe are totally compatible with Professor Layton's world in which the word "death" appears around as often as "rotary hoe". (And then it's implemented on an Ace Attorney fansite.)
Spoiler : Spoiler-Free Summary :
Professor Layton and the Turnabout of the Golden Witch is pretty complicated to sum up, so here, have a hint coin text.

"This one is deceptively easy. Go on, think about it!"
Spoiler : Spoilerous Summary :
Professor Layton and the Turnabout of the Golden Witch is the game with the biggest pre-loader seen on AAO. I missed the first few seconds because I got impatient 3 mins in the preloader, got chicken curry and it finished before I could get back.

Anyway, welcome to Umineko Simulator 2016. After re-reading Episode 8, we find ourselves in an airplant housing Layton and Luke. Apparently, a true gentleman doesn't sit on the same side on the airplane as the person he wants to speak with;
and he doesn't even sit down, just shouts over to the other side while standing. Proper airplane etiquette.

The two are headed to [some japanese name] who turns out to be Ushiromiya Ange who turned into a redhead Misty Fey over the years. She challenges them to find out the truth behind the Rokkenjima Massacre to save her family. They go to the Meta-World, meet Dlanor who gives them an earful for Layton games not following the Knox decalogue, then the game is abruptly over. We also find out that Ange? is actually Will?. Regardless, Layton and Luke were probably not called here for what they were said they were.
Oh, also puzzles.
Spoiler : VERY SPOILEROUS Review :
Story Concept:
"Do you have an interesting, engaging, innovative and logical story? Are the characters interesting?"
Well, this story is possibly one of the most innovative among the entrants, see the beginning of this post - I sure wouldn't have thought this was a viable crossover. But it is, and it somehow stays perfectly logical. Even the purple truth will apparently signify cross-examination statements in this trial, which makes a heckload of sense when you think about it.
The characters are really as interesting as their in-franchise counterparts. Except Dlanor, who's way cooler here.

Rating: 8reat

Story Execution:
"Is the story well-paced? Is the dialogue and narration well-written and natural-sounding?"
Well, the pacing is a bit off. Starting from the Umineko-style segment that takes a lot more time to complete than normal because of the (beautiful) scrolling text graphics, we jump into a Laytonesque world where we can't go 5 minutes without a random puzzle shoehorned in.
It's not just the author's fault - it's how the two respective works manage time. They just don't mix that well.

The dialogue's great, though - albeit everyone is eccentric enough not to sound natural. Still, the fact that everyone's personality was faithful to the originals and still managed to make a coherent dialogue just means there's a buttload of knowledge of both works behind it.

Rating: 7he two franchises don't mix that well time-wise, but otherwise superb

Graphics & Music:
"Are the graphics and music well-done? Do they fit the characters, situations and atmosphere?"
Aside from Battler's shirt being red when he's back to back with Beatrice in the opening scene, there's literally nothing that can be complained about regarding graphics. On the contrary - the four-and-a-half minute pre-loader makes sure we get an astounding amount of custom sprites, music, backgrounds, transitions, music, and an incredible heckload of timed graphics like .svg's. No other crossover trial on this site even begins to approximate this level of faithfulness to the source material graphics-wise.

Image
Although I have to admit this is the only other crossover trial I can think of

Still, why am I "only" giving this a 10 when TTT got 11?

...The typesetting. Line breaks are important, okay?

Rating: 10 sono dio e questo è perfetto

Technical Perfection:
"Has your trial been tested carefully, with few bugs, typos or grammar mistakes?"
First of all, Layton's name is spelled Hershel. We even have a user by that name.
But aside from "Incidentally, the world line where Battler and Eva-san survived has a divergence of 0.000001% (comma missing)", I didn't find any other technical flaws.

In fact, this entry nets bonus points for following the Umineko-style spelling and ellipses, which shows a great knowledge of the source material.
(E, even when I don't agree with it..........)

Rating: 9rand

Gameplay:
"Is the gameplay fair, interesting and enjoyable? Are the puzzles designed and executed well?"
"Are the puzzles designed and executed well?" is probably the question that this entire trial was built around.
Beautiful graphics, 3 hints and a super hint, solution textboxes accepting a variety of fair solutions, and solutions requiring you to think outside the box. (Although the cheese one was bull - you can't show a picture of cheese and then say "you know, cheese doesn't have to be like that".)

But please but a frame after the pre-loader. I'm seriously subtracting a point for this. You can't expect anyone to wait the 4 and a half minutes out just staring at their screens.

Rating: 9enerous amounts of brilliance

Theme Relevance:
"Is the theme relevant to your story? Is it interpreted in an interesting and innovative way?"
Well, as an unfinished entry, we, again, don't know how relevant the theme will be. It's something that works mainly in retrospect.
Still, the narrator's text that seemed to change perspectives all the time, coupled with the final reveal, was untrustworthy enough.

Rating: 5hame that it's unfinished

Overall:
8 + 7 + 10 + 9 + 9 + 5 = 48 / 60 (8)

In summary, an improbable but somehow still functional crossover with megatons of graphics and a great story.
Spoiler : Scores, Spoiler-Free :
Overall:
8 + 7 + 10 + 9 + 9 + 5 = 48 / 60 (8)
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by Evo »

Image

Click here for the full review. If you want to be spoiled on the entry and Dual Destinies, that is.
Spoiler : Non-spoiler review :
Story Concept
Well, it’s a comedy, so the story is very… bizarre. Still, the mystery, trial and what we got of the solution so far make logical sense. The mystery and twist are very good for a comedy, although the most interesting mystery hasn’t been explained yet: how Apollo ended up in Bizarro Land. There were some really interesting ideas, some more serious than others, and the characters were hilarious. Overall, great concept.

Story Execution
Was the dialogue natural-sounding and in character for canon characters? Absolutely not! And it was glorious. With a comedy, I suppose the most important part is whether the humor was executed well, and that it was. We’ve had many different sources of humor: references, fourth-wall-breaking, memes, eccentric characters, accidental characters and just bizarre situations. They all worked for me. Great job!

Graphics & Music
I didn’t really notice the music for the most part, so I assume it fit. As for graphics, we’ve had some great custom sprites for the eccentric witnesses that really helped the fun. Other than that, graphics were mostly standard.

Technical Perfection
The PM said that this wasn’t beta-tested. That explains why there are some typos and a lot of four-liners. Nothing too bad, though.

Gameplay
Standard trial gameplay that was fun and mostly fair. I’m not too fond of memory contradictions and since I took a break halfway through the trial I had to use the walkthrough for those, but the second memory prompt was amazing. Serious, that was beautiful.

Theme Relevance
There was definitely a lot of theme-relevance. We probably haven’t seen all of it yet considering the case is only almost complete, but what’s already there is pretty good and really makes you think about all that happened in a new light, which is what I wanted to achieve with the theme in the first place.

Score
Keep in mind that I’m trying to avoid a “four-point scale” – I’m expecting a lot of entries to be really good, so in order for the points to actually mean something, I have to set the standards quite high. So a 7 is not the lowest possible rating, but actually really good.
Story Concept: 8/10
Story Execution: 9/10
Graphics & Music: 6/10
Technical Perfection: 5/10
Gameplay: 6/10
Theme Relevance: 8/10
Final Score: 7.0/10

Conclusion:
A really entertaining comedy with a surprisingly good mystery. If you enjoy silly characters, references and fourth-wall comedy, play this case.
I'm not updating the counter anymore since I don't know how to count the last two entries. For the record, both are around 2000 frames and incomplete, although enigma's is almost complete, while clcman and RiksKing's is almost a preview.
Let's just say that the entries range from around 1000 to around 4000 frames in length and half of them are complete. The majority is feature-level quality and I really liked all of them. Conclusion: I love this competition. :awesome:

Before I post the last review, I have a question: Do you want us to post the full ranking or just the top three, since getting 8th place might be discouraging? (Although the entry that finished 8th is still really, really good and I loved it.)
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DWaM »

First three is probably the better choice.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by TheDoctor »

@DeeYo
Spoiler : Turnabout of the Golden Witch Graphics/Music response :
Actually, Battler's shirt is supposed to be red there. The narration states he lost his jacket before you see that scene. Underneath his cream-colored jacket, he's wearing a red shirt.
Spoiler : Gameplay response :
You could consider the picture of the cheese wheel to be part of the unreliable narration. I admit, it is a little mean, but if you try brute forcing it, it really shouldn't take too long to get past the puzzle (I... really had a hard time figuring out what I should use as the image there, tbh).
Thank you for playing/reviewing!

EDIT: I'm okay with just the top three being posted, although in my case, if I don't make it into the top three, I wouldn't mind having my placement PM'd to me.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DeeYo »

TheDoctor wrote:
Spoiler : Turnabout of the Golden Witch Graphics/Music response :
Actually, Battler's shirt is supposed to be red there. The narration states he lost his jacket before you see that scene. Underneath his cream-colored jacket, he's wearing a red shirt.
Spoiler : response :
Pfft, I don't believe the narration.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by RiksKing »

TheDoctor wrote: I'm okay with just the top three being posted, although in my case, if I don't make it into the top three, I wouldn't mind having my placement PM'd to me.
I'd agree with this, although I can't speak for clcman.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DeeYo »

The Book of Turnabouts is a YA fantasy novel / "What Do They Fear" Episode x Ghost Trick crossover.
Spoiler : Spoiler-Free Summary :
The Book of Turnabouts is a kinetic novel in which Mia Fey and Miles Edgeworth get inexplicably warped into Random Land whose only law is to mess with the protags as much as possible. The plot twist is that this seems to be totally reliable narration that actually happens.
Spoiler : Spoilerous Summary :
The Book of Turnabouts is a kinetic novel in which Mia Fey and Miles Edgeworth find a mysterious book that inexplicably warps them into a game created by Dahlia Hawthorne. (He planned on abducting Mia and Diego Armando, but missed.) We meet Bibble portrayed by Lisa Basil sprites - basically a tutorial program for the game. We also learn that we'll be able to get out if we solve the mystery Dahlia gave us.

Then we run around locations aimlessly, finding out that Dahlia created the case to mess with us as much as possible, making Maya the defendant, Misty Fey the victim, and including Larry at all.

Then we meet Iris who tells us that we're in her book. Credits rollThis is where the game ends due to unfinishedness.
Spoiler : VERY SPOILEROUS Review :
Story Concept:
"Do you have an interesting, engaging, innovative and logical story? Are the characters interesting?"
The concept is unique in terms of an AAO trial, but pretty trite when viewed at as a whole. A magical object that warps you somewhere else, the big bad creating the world according to the protags' greatest fears - nothing we haven't seen before. And, since this doesn't seem to strictly follow AA rules (see: magical book that warps you into a world where Dahlia is God), I'm not judging this as if it was an AA game but as a visual novel. For which is falls pretty flat, for now. May get better when the trial parts are done, though.

Characters were solid, though.

Rating: 6, i can't put my finger on it but i've seen the entire plot somewhere else

Story Execution:
"Is the story well-paced? Is the dialogue and narration well-written and natural-sounding?"
The dialogue was really witty, I have to admit. Still, the story itself could have been executed in a less clichéd fashion. Warping into a diff dimension -> meeting the antagonist that gloats at us -> meeting the other virtual characters is how it always goes.

Rating: 8reat

Graphics & Music:
"Are the graphics and music well-done? Do they fit the characters, situations and atmosphere?"
The trial uses little custom graphics, and when it does...

Image
Inverting the colors in the background and playing the music in reverse is less creepy than amateurish, imo

This entry falls short of high-effort solutions seen in other entries. For a case so intrinsically built on supernatural things and an alternate dimension, I'd have expected the backgrounds or the characters to be "off", stuff to be more creepy.

Rating: 5ad, but true

Technical Perfection:
"Has your trial been tested carefully, with few bugs, typos or grammar mistakes?"
The case's grammar was especially polished. Idiomatic expressions abound, perfect use of commas and the like. There was one bigger technical flaw that I found - going from the Meditation Room to Winding Way and back to the Meditation Room starts the introduction convo again. For an entry with almost no gameplay, this is a pretty serious flaw.

Rating: 8ood, except for this instance

Gameplay:
"Is the gameplay fair, interesting and enjoyable? Are the puzzles designed and executed well?"
"Are the puzzles designed and executed well?" is probably the question that this entire trial was built around.
I'd like to quote the entirety of the walkthrough provided.

If you can't Talk, Move. If you can't Move, Talk. If you can't do either, something has gone horribly wrong and you should try to contact me.

I've never given high scores to a kinetic novel in this regard and I won't start now. (Even if it seems this entry will have sections with gameplay later.) You're well aware of the risks of submitting a kinetic novel to a competition where one of the categories is Gameplay, so...

Rating: 5orry, I can only judge the parts that are finished

Theme Relevance:
"Is the theme relevant to your story? Is it interpreted in an interesting and innovative way?"
This is another part that I don't really get. A book that transports you into another dimension just screams this isn't real, it's some allegory or nightmare or something. But there's no indication of the sort here. Seems our heroes really were warped away, they really did meet Dahlia and she really did create a hellish world for them. The only part where confirmed theme relevance even remotely comes up is the last FRAME.

Rating: 3xplain, please

Overall:
6 + 8 + 5 + 8 + 5 + 3 = 35 / 60 (~5.2?)

In summary, a pretty clichéd plot with really solid writing. I can't wait to see how it continues.
Spoiler : Scores, Spoiler-Free :
Overall:
6 + 8 + 5 + 8 + 5 + 3 = 35 / 60 (~5.2?)
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by Evo »

Image

Full review might be coming soon if clcman and RiksKing allow it to be posted.
Spoiler : Non-spoiler review :
Story Concept
I haven’t seen much of the story yet, but it has a lot of potential. You’re going deep into canon here in a good and interesting way that will probably develop three well-known characters a lot. The mystery seems fairly standard, but combined with the setting it’s really interesting. I’d love to see more of this!

Story Execution
The dialogue was really, really well-written. Canon characters were perfectly in character, the dialogue sounded natural and there was a lot of wittiness. Canon characterization is definitely the strong part of this trial and might deserve a 10. The investigation was slightly dragging, though. Until that one weird scene, at least. But then it was over, sadly.

Graphics & Music
The characters were almost all canon characters, so the sprites were standard, although a few cool custom expressions were added. There were two or so custom backgrounds which created great mindscrew moments. I don’t remember the music (that’s what I get for writing my reviews so late) and there’s nothing in my notes, so it was probably fitting.

Technical Perfection
I assume that the deadline got in the way of testing, so I understand why there are a few typos, blank frames and many four-liners. I already deducted enough points for the missing optional dialogue in the gameplay section. Overall, the presentation issues were noticeable, but not detracting from the case that much.

Gameplay
With a very linear investigation and almost all optional dialogue not being implemented yet, it was basically a kinetic story for all intents and purposes, only it wasn’t advertised as such. I trust that will be different in the complete case, though. I’m hoping for some cool optional dialogue (like in the office) and trial gameplay.

Theme Relevance
There is a character called Narrator who is very unreliable, so you get a few points for being theme-relevant by wordplay. Unfortunately, the actual theme relevance isn’t implemented yet. I have a few ideas what it might be, though.

Score
Keep in mind that I’m trying to avoid a “four-point scale” – I’m expecting a lot of entries to be really good, so in order for the points to actually mean something, I have to set the standards quite high. So a 7 is not the lowest possible rating, but actually really good.
Story Concept: 7/10
Story Execution: 9/10
Graphics & Music: 6/10
Technical Perfection: 5/10
Gameplay: 3/10
Theme Relevance: 2/10
Final Score: 5.3/10

Conclusion:
A highly interesting take on canon that suffers from incompleteness. If you like AA and want to see canon characters act amazingly in character, play this once there’s a complete part.
And that's the last review for me. Expect results after DeeYo's review of DWaM's entry.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DeeYo »

Oh, right, if anyone thinks I revealed too much info in my summaries or reviews, please notify me.
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Re: Never Trust The Narrator

Post by DWaM »

ur lack of knowledge on battler's attire revealed ur not a hardcur umineko fan
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